Breaking the ice

Jaxon

It had been a few days since Grace and I had talked about everything—since we had that kiss, that moment when everything felt so clear, even though I knew there was still a lot left unsaid between us. The weight of it still lingered in the back of my mind, but things felt... lighter, somehow. Maybe it was the fact that I wasn't pretending anymore. I wasn't trying to keep my distance or act like everything was easy. With Grace, things never felt easy, but they also never felt forced. She saw the cracks in my armor and didn't run—she traced them like they were something beautiful. Like she wasn't afraid of the broken pieces that could cut her.

And as much as I wanted to say I was fine with it, the truth was, it kept me on edge. My thoughts about her were scattered, sometimes conflicting. But I couldn't help but feel drawn to her. Like I was in too deep, and the only way out was forward, no matter how messy it got.

I stood by the locker room entrance after practice, watching my teammates file out, but my mind was elsewhere. My focus had drifted off to Grace, to the time we'd spent together recently. And as much as I hated to admit it, I'd been thinking about the way we'd left things. It had been a long time since I let myself be vulnerable with anyone, especially with someone like Grace.

I was still figuring out how to navigate everything. How to keep the balance between the guy I was on the ice, in control, and the guy who found himself wanting more than just the casual flirtations with Grace.

"Jaxon! You planning on standing there all day, or are you gonna come get some food?" Nate called out from across the room.

I glanced over at him, a smile tugging at the corner of my mouth. Nate was always good at pulling me out of my head. "Yeah, yeah. I'm coming. Just got distracted," I replied, tossing my towel in my locker.

I met up with him outside the rink, the chilly air hitting me as we stepped into the sunlight. The day was just starting to turn into night, the streetlights flickering on, casting long shadows over the sidewalk. We walked side by side toward the campus diner, the place we always ended up when we needed to talk through whatever was on our minds.

"So, what's been going on with you lately?" Nate asked casually, his hands stuffed in his jacket pockets. "I've barely seen you around. You've been all over the place."

I raised an eyebrow, chuckling. "What do you mean, 'all over the place'? I've been practicing."

"I meant with her," Nate teased, nudging me with his elbow. "Grace. C'mon, don't tell me you're not getting all sentimental on me now."

I rolled my eyes, but there was a truth to his words that I couldn't ignore. "It's... complicated, man," I said, taking a deep breath. "I don't know. I mean, yeah, we kissed. But things feel different now. She makes me feel like I'm not in control of... anything."

Nate snorted. "That's because you're not in control, my dude. You've been trying to keep everything in line, and now you're actually facing the real deal with her. It's not like any game on the ice, Jax. You can't just push people around with a stick and call it a win."

I shot him a sideways glance. "That's easy for you to say. You've always been the easy-going one."

"I've never been in your position, that's true. But here's the thing, man," Nate continued, his tone more serious now. "You can't just keep her at arm's length and hope it'll work out. You have to be real. If you're feeling something for her, you need to act on it. Otherwise, you're just gonna end up hurting her—and yourself."

His words hung in the air, and for a moment, I found myself lost in thought. He was right, but it was easier said than done. I wasn't sure I could just lay my cards on the table like that. Not when I still had so many questions myself.

"Easy for you to say," I muttered again, but with less bite.

We reached the diner and slid into a booth, ordering food before I could think any more about what Nate had said. The conversation shifted to lighter things—practice, some of the funny moments from the game last weekend, the usual banter—but my mind kept drifting back to Grace.

I couldn't ignore it anymore.

I'd tried, but now I was hooked. And as much as I hated how out of control I felt, I also couldn't bring myself to walk away.

Later that evening, after dinner, I found myself outside her dorm building again, leaning against the wall, waiting for Grace to come down. I had no real reason to be here, other than the fact that I couldn't stop thinking about her.

And honestly? I didn't want to.

I heard the sound of footsteps approaching and looked up, only to be met with Grace's smiling face. She looked casual in jeans and a sweater, but there was something about her, something I couldn't put into words. Something that made my heart skip a beat.

"Hey," she said, her voice soft and warm.

"Hey." I grinned back, my pulse quickening just from the sight of her. "How was practice?"

"Good. Same old, same old." She shrugged but then met my eyes, and for a moment, there was a quiet, understanding look between us. I didn't know what it meant exactly, but it made my chest tighten in a way I didn't expect.

"I missed you today," I admitted, my words coming out before I could stop them. I winced internally, but I didn't take them back.

Grace's eyes softened. "I missed you too."

It was a simple exchange, but it felt significant, like we were both acknowledging that something was shifting between us.

Before I could say anything else, she stepped closer to me, and I couldn't help myself. The temptation to kiss her, to feel that connection again, was too much. Without overthinking it, I cupped her face with one hand and leaned down, pressing my lips against hers.

This kiss was different from the others. There was a quiet desperation to it, a longing, and I could feel her hands grip the front of my jacket, pulling me closer.

When we finally broke away, both of us breathing a little heavier, she smiled, her eyes sparkling with a mix of surprise and something deeper.

"I think I'm falling for you, Jaxon," she whispered, her voice barely audible.

The words hit me harder than I expected. I wasn't sure if I was ready to say the same thing, but in that moment, standing there with her, I realized I didn't need to say anything. Not yet.

But maybe soon.

For now, all I could do was pull her in for another kiss, knowing that this—whatever it was—wasn't over. It was just the beginning.