Annoying As Hell // Keegan x Y/N (mlm)

Keegan barely had a second to gather himself before the door to his office swung open, and in walked the bane of his existence.

You.

Just fucking great.

His jaw clenched as he shot you a glare, leaning back against the couch. "The hell are you here for now?" he scoffed, irritation already lacing his tone. You didn't even knock. You just barged in like you owned the damn place.

Your smirk was as insufferable as always. "Miss me?"

He rolled his eyes. "Like I'd miss a damn headache."

You chuckled, strolling deeper into the room, hands casually tucked into your pockets as if you hadn't just intruded on his already miserable attempt to get you out of his head. Keegan watched you closely, his fingers tapping against his knee in barely restrained annoyance.

"You've been avoiding me," you said, tilting your head.

He huffed, looking away. "No, I haven't."

You raised an eyebrow. "Uh-huh. Sure. So the fact that you practically teleport out of a room the second I walk in is just a coincidence?"

"Maybe I just don't like being around you."

"Ouch. Right in the heart." You placed a hand over your chest mockingly. "You wound me, Russ."

He shot you a dry look. "If only."

Just as you said your last remark, Keegan noticed the way you sauntered toward him, an unmistakable glint in your eyes that made his stomach twist. He frowned, his instincts immediately on alert.

"What?" he muttered, raising an eyebrow as you loomed over him.

You didn't say a word. Instead, before he could react, you plopped yourself directly onto his lap.

"Ack-!" He let out a sharp grunt at the sudden weight, his hands immediately moving to shove you off. "The fuck-get off!"

But you were nothing if not stubborn. Before he could fully push you away, your arms wrapped around his neck, holding on like a goddamn parasite.

"What the fuck are you doing, Y/N?" he growled, his voice edged with both irritation and something else-something he really didn't want to acknowledge. His body was way too warm, and he absolutely refused to admit it was because of your touch.

You just laughed, leaning in closer, your breath fanning against his cheek. "What's wrong, Russ?" you teased, voice dropping ever so slightly. "Don't like holding someone close?"

Keegan's eye twitched.

His hands were still gripping your waist, half caught between shoving you off and-God forbid-keeping you in place. The second option wasn't even on the table, but the heat spreading through his skin told a different story.

"I swear to God-" He gave another forceful push, but you only tightened your grip, your smug expression making his blood boil.

"You're kinda warm, y'know that?" you hummed, tilting your head.

Keegan scowled. "I'm about to make you real warm-when I throw your ass in the fucking furnace."

You snickered. "Mmm, touchy."

"You are literally touching me, dumbass."

"Yeah. And?"

Keegan groaned, pressing his head back against the couch, staring up at the ceiling as if praying for divine intervention. He could not deal with this. With you.

"Okay, seriously-get off before I make you regret it." His voice was a low growl, though it lacked the bite he wished it had.

You only smirked wider. "Make me."

His fingers twitched.

His patience was running on fumes.

You were still perched on his lap, arms wrapped around his neck like some insufferable clinging creature, wearing that smug little smirk that made him want to either strangle you or-nope. Not finishing that thought.

"Make you?" Keegan echoed, his voice dangerously low. His grip on your waist tightened-not enough to hurt, but enough to remind you who the hell you were messing with. "You're really testing me, Y/N."

Your grin didn't falter. If anything, it widened. "Oh? What are you gonna do, Sargeant? Scold me?~"

His jaw clenched. Oh, you thought you were so damn funny.

"You really wanna find out?" His voice dropped even lower, his usual sharp sarcasm layered with something else-something heavy.

Your eyes flicked over his face, gauging his expression, that gleam of mischief never fading. "I dunno. Maybe I do." you mused, tilting your head slightly. "You keep avoiding me, Keegan. Makes me wonder why."

His body tensed.

And there it was. The exact thing he'd been trying to avoid.

You knew. You had to know.

Keegan let out a slow breath, forcing himself to shove down whatever was bubbling in his chest. "You are the single most insufferable person I've ever met," he muttered.

"And you are terrible at dodging questions," you shot back, your smirk never faltering. "C'mon, Keegan. You think I haven't noticed?"

His grip on your waist twitched. "Noticed what?" he said, playing dumb.

You gave him a look. "Oh, I dunno. The way you've been avoiding me for days? The way you nearly had a fucking meltdown when I sat in your lap?" You leaned in slightly, voice dropping. "The way you still haven't pushed me off?"

Keegan immediately shoved you off.

You barely caught yourself before you hit the floor, landing on your feet with an amused chuckle. "Took ya long enough."

Keegan stood up so fast it made his head spin, his hands balling into fists at his sides. "You're a fucking menace."

"You love it."

His eye twitched. "Get out."

You grinned. "Alright, alright. No need to get your panties in a twist, Russ." You made a mock salute before strolling towards the door.

Just as you reached for the handle, you paused, glancing over your shoulder. "Y'know... I think I will sit on your lap again sometime."

Keegan glared at you. "Try it, and I will break your damn legs."

"Mm, tempting."

Keegan launched a nearby pillow at your head. You ducked with a laugh, slipping out the door before he could actually strangle you.

The second you were gone, Keegan collapsed back onto the couch, dragging his hands down his face.

'I'm going to fucking kill him.'

...Or worse.