You're Making Me Crazy, Professor [COMPLETED]

I'm already here at the University, tahimik lang akong nakaupo habang ang mga kaklase ko ay nagsasagot pa rin ng test. Cynthia gave us a 100-item test, plus an essay worth 50 points. I'm done-again, as usual. Pero kahit tapos na ako, hindi ko magawang ngumiti. Hindi ko maalis sa isip ko 'yung nangyari kanina.

Hindi niya ako pinapansin. I've been trying to catch her eye, kahit mabilis lang, pero wala. Ayaw talaga niya akong tignan. We had a fight kanina sa bahay niya, just before we left for school. Kahit anong suyo at lambing ko, wala-parang wala na talaga siyang gana sa akin.

Flashback

We were in the kitchen earlier. She was making breakfast for the both of us-something simple, pero favorite ko: garlic fried rice, itlog, and ham. I was sitting quietly at the table at first, just watching her move around. Ang ganda niya kahit naka-pambahay lang, her hair was still a little messy.

But of course, I couldn't stay quiet for long. I got up and walked behind her, then wrapped my arms around her waist. I kissed her back gently, a soft, slow kiss-just something sweet to start the morning. Pero hindi ko in-expect ang reaksyon niya.

"Stop kissing me," she said, coldly, pushing me away with one hand.

Napaatras ako ng bahagya. "Huh? Why? Did I do something wrong? Ba't ka ganyan?" I asked, my lips forming a pout, trying to keep things light kahit there's something off.

Kanina lang, okay naman kami. She even hugged me sa kama bago kami bumangon. Pero ngayon, parang ibang tao siya.

"Did you have fun making love with your girls before, huh?" she asked, her voice sharp while she plated the food. "Did that feel good for you?"

"Ha? Wait-what? That was a long time ago! And it wasn't even serious! It was just a game-" Naputol ang paliwanag ko. "Wait... paano mo nalaman?"

She turned and stared at me, eyes calm but guarded. "I'm not stupid. I know you more than you know yourself. I know the things you've done."

Natahimik ako. Hindi ko alam kung anong isasagot. Ang bigat sa dibdib. Hindi ko akalaing may ganito pa pala siyang kinikimkim.

Then she added, more quietly, "Stop kissing me... it reminds me of you kissing someone else. And there were many of them."

She placed the plate on the table, sat down, and started eating without saying anything more. I just stood there, still, wishing I could take it all back-even the things I did before I met her.

I couldn't stand it. The silence felt suffocating. She'd always been the one to make the first move, to apologize when things went wrong, but now she was pulling away, and I had no idea how to fix it.

I had to do something. I had to make her understand that it was all in the past, that she was the one I cared about. I couldn't let her think that I was still the same person who made mistakes back then.

I took a deep breath, gathering what little courage I had left. "Cynthia, please, listen to me."

She didn't turn around, but I could tell she heard me. She always did.

"Please," I said again, this time a little more firmly. "I know you're upset, but what happened before-it's in the past. It was before I even met you. It was just a stupid game. It doesn't mean anything, Cynthia. Nothing ever meant anything like what you mean to me."