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"Okay, one more," he said.
I groaned, lowkey annoyed. "Fuck, okay." I took a moment to catch my breath. He stood behind me just to make sure I was doing it correctly, I went down and squatted with the weights again, my body trembling slightly from the effort. It burned. Everything burned. But I did it.
He held his hand out and took the bar from me. "Good job. See, I knew you had it in you."
"I'm tired as fuck," I huffed.
"Aw, you got it. You may be little as fuck, but you a strong one."
I let out a breathless laugh. "I have to be."
We both laughed and grabbed our towels and water, then sat down on the bench for a minute. My body was screaming, but in a weird way, it felt good. Like a release. I had decided to get back in the gym and Jeff had offered to help.
At first, I thought it'd be chill stretch a little, hit the treadmill. Nah. This man had me lifting weights day one like I was training for the Olympics.
Was it a smart idea to let a professional gym rat take the lead? No. Hell no. But honestly, I needed it. With everything that's been going on lately, the gym was one of the only places I could shut my brain off. Here, pain made sense. Here, I could sweat out the anxiety and all the shit I couldn't control. It was helping more than I wanted to admit not just my body, but my mind. My soul too.
"But wassup with you? Haven't seen you at practice lately."
I tilted my head a little, squinting at him. "Why you checking for me? Your focus should be on the kids."
He laughed. "Damn, relax. I just noticed you wasn't there... usually it's you and that girl who look like you a little bit."
"First of all, you're nosey," I said, taking a sip of my water. "And second of all, I've been busy, so I couldn't really be there much."
Actually, that was far from the truth. It's been three weeks since I broke up with Beyoncé, and just like I was afraid she might do, I feel like she's keeping him away from me. I can't prove it necessarily, because every time I ask if I can spend time with him, she's always saying that he's at his friend's house. Or if I ask if I can come over and see him, it's always some type of excuse.
I still call and talk to him, but seeing him physically? Haven't done that in almost three weeks. I respect people's space, and I didn't pop up at her house or anything, because let's be honest I don't have any legal attachment to him.
So if she wanted to, she could most definitely put a restraining order on me. I don't think she will, but still...
