i want to be me not your puppet

  "Look at the monkey's Alec, they look like you,"Colt teased her son as he sat up on her shoulders.

"Don't be mean mummy,"Alec whined his small cheeks tinting red from embarrassment.

"So, how have you been Alex?"Colt asks as we continue our walk through the zoo, I take a deep breath in before answering.

"I'm okay I guess, the wedding is in ten days and I have no Idea what I'm doing, I mean I love you an Alec is great but I love Jay too, It's just she is.."I stop. Jade was what? Angry, verbally abusive and sometimes physically abusive, but after it she always apologises.

"She is what?"Colt looks at me concerned her blue eyes searching my face for some kind of reassurance that I was telling the truth. My hand touching the top of my arm where the brusies from Jade gripping me were still there.

"She is just a bit stressed you know, wedding stuff,"I tell her, it wasn't a lie but it wasn't the entire truth, if Colt ever found out about the way Jade had pushed and pulled and screamed at me this past week, we would be planning a funeral for Jade instead of a wedding.

"Has she done something to upset you?"Colt asks as we enter the penguin habitat.

"I'm always upset Colt you know that,"I smile faintly

"Has she upset you, more than usual?"Colt rephrases the question, I wanted her to let it go because I didn't want to lie to her, I wanted to tell her the truth but it would make things worse.

"I don't know if its her or the bridesmaids,"I try to joke but my laugh comes out more like I was choking.

"I don't know how you can survive in that house with all those girls!"Colt laughs holding on tightly to Alec's legs so he wouldn't fall from her shoulders.

"I know it's killing me, but they are out most of the time now looking for dates to the wedding so it's getting easier,"I tell her as she stops to take Alec off her shoulders.

"Sorry bud, you're killing me up there,"She tells him taking his hand,walking again. "So how's you're dad looking forwards to walking his little girl down the isle?"Colt asks me a small smile on her pefectly shaped mouth.

"He is happy about taking me down the isle, however, he isn't happy that it's Jade standing at the end,"I tell her frowning, Dad hated Jade with a burning passion, he has never liked her.

"Can you blame him?"Colt scoffs quietly I give her a glare making her raise her free hand in surrender. "I'm just saying, when Alec gets married I'm going to hate the girl or boy he marries, he is my kid,it is kind of the parents job to hate the partner,"Colt shrugs as she explains.

"I don't wanna get married,"Alec interjects stopping to watch the two penguins who looked like the were kissing "Are they boyfriend and girlfriend?"Alec looks up at Colt his finger pointing at the pair.

"Maybe,"Colt answers watching as one of the two penguins wanders away from its partner, going to another penguin and doing the same thing.

"It's cheating!"Alec shouts dramatically his hand covering his mouth.

"Voice level down Alec,"Colt warns him, I watch as the three penguins curiously, Deciding to name them.

Penny, was the penguin who had kissed both penguins pip and peppy. Penny kissed pip first but left pip for peppy leaving pip all alone and sad but penny and peppy were happy, so I mean did it really matter about pip? Some other penguin would come along an make pip happy one day, right?

A better penguin that penny. 

Penny waddled back over to pip kissing pip again, Leaving peppy alone, peppy wasn't like pip, instead of standing there sad like pip had peppy waddled over to another penguin. letting all four penguins be happy. Penny had made the mistake of leaving pip for peppy so penny went back an in the end it worked out better for all penguins...