Edited
Word count: 3365
Genre: Angst, high school!Dan and Phil
Warnings: Self-harm, depression and bullying
POV: Phil
A/n: Dan and Phil are the same age (16) in year eleven but Phil is slightly older.
-/-/-
I tug down my sleeve as I sit down in English. I have no friends. Daniel Howell on the other hand, is the most popular boy in school. I'm also bullied by him and his friends. I'm different to them.
"Today, we'll be learning about Romeo and Juliet." Miss says. I groan and doodle in my book, writing down notes at some points.
"Okay, who wants to be Romeo?" Miss asks. I slide down my chair slightly. "Philip, you haven't been anything yet!"
"Actually I've been the lead roles for the last few lessons." I say.
"Ah... Well another one can't hurt you." She smiles. I sigh and take the script. "And any takers for Juliet? Daniel! You can be Juliet!" I almost choke. I have a massive crush on Daniel although he bullies me.
"I'm not a girl, miss." Daniel scoffs.
"Oh well! You can be Julio then, the male version of Juliet."
"But, that's gay!" Jack calls out. Daniel laughs with his group.
"So?"
When I finish saying my lines, I wait for the over dramatic reading from Daniel.
"*Insert Juliet lines*." Daniel says. I feel like crying. He's such a dick! He mocked me throughout his speech. Daniel and I grew up together so I told him I was gay. I don't think he told anyone, but he teases me about it everyday. The bell rings, signalling break has started. I sigh and pack up. I rush out the classroom and try to get to the library before Daniel and his lot get me.
"Hey, faggot, where are you going?" Jack calls. I gulp and keep walking.
"He asked you a question." Finn growls. Finn grabs my school blazer and pins me against the wall. I cry out and try to get away.
"Going off to do gay shit?" My eyes widen as I realise Daniel must have told them. Our eyes meet and Daniel shakes his head.
I didn't tell them. Daniel mouths. He's always like this. When no ones looking, he's nice to me. Well, kinda. He has apparently hooked up with all the girls in our year. I feel tears rolls down my face as Jack punches my chest. I squeeze my eyes shut. When I open them again, my eyes wonder to Daniel again. He's pushing his girlfriend against the wall and making out with her. I sob and hang my head.
"Leave him alone!" A voice yells. I lift my head and see a girl with long curly hair running to us.
"Carrie?" Finn gasps.
"Leave him alone, Finn." Carrie says. They scamper off. "Are you okay?"
"No." I wheeze. I glance at Daniel and Cat again. Daniel is looking at me worriedly while Cat is trying to get Daniel's attention.
"Stupid question really." She smiles.
"I'm Phil." I say, clutching my chest.
"Carrie." She grins.
"Oi! Lester!" I hear Felix shout. Daniel is in the middle of this troop of bullies. They reach me and corner me.
"I think it's Dan's turn to hit Lester." Tom sniggers. I whimper and try to find an escape route.
"Nah." Daniel shakes his head.
"Come on man, are you a pussy?" Jack sneers.
"No, I-"
"Hit him!" Finn shouts. I look Daniel in the eyes and he softens his look. I nod and look down. "Hit him!" Daniel swings his fist at me. I whimper as it hits my side. I shield my face and crouch down. Jack and Felix kick me and I feel my sleeve moving down. I try to hide my arm, but I already know that someone has seen it.
"Why me!" I yell. I burst out in tears and clutch at my arm. I've cut myself for the hundredth time this week. I cry out and try to breathe. Once I've calm down slightly, I dress my arm with bandages and check the several bruises. The biggest one is the one that Daniel gave me.
The next day, Daniel is sitting slightly away from his friends. I scratch my arm and collect my bags when the bell rings. Daniel gets out before me and walks away from his friends. I am curious, so I follow him. He goes into the boys bathroom. No one else is in there. He hasn't realised that I'm in the room too, so I hide in a stall.
"Fuck." I hear Daniel whisper. "Don't bleed now!" I gasp but, cover my mouth. "I'm so stupid! I knew I couldn't trust Cat! I'm a shit human." Daniel cries. "I shouldn't have hit Phil. He hates me now. Fuck, this is bad." Daniel huffs.
"I don't hate you." I sigh, stepping out from the stall. Daniel jumps and hides his arm behind his back.
"You heard everything?" Daniel asks.
"Yeah." I nod.
"I'm really sorry." Daniel whimpers. He tries to keep up a strong outer shell, but it crumbles and he starts to cry.
"I forgive you." I mutter. "Please explain."
"Explain what?"
"What's bleeding, what did you tell Cat and why are you not with your friends?"
"Um... I broke up with Cat because... I'm gay. She told some of my friends." Daniel sniffs. "And my arm. My arm is bleeding." Daniel takes his arm from behind his back. I gasp at it. It's littered with small and large scars. A large cut is bleeding. I gently hold his arm and look at the cut. I lift up my own sleeve and Daniel winces at the bandage. I unwrap it and Daniel whimpers at my arm. "Fuck, Phil." He sees the freshest one. "They're really deep. I'm so sorry!" Daniel cries.
"It's not your fault, Daniel." I say softly. I take his arm again and wrap the bandage around it. I had changed it this morning, so there's no blood on it.
"Please, call me Dan. And you need the bandage more than me." Dan protests.
"Mine won't bleed." I assure him. Dan throws his arms around me and sobs. I hug him back and blush. Dan pulls away and kisses me gently.
"It's not true, by the way." Dan mutters. I start to panic.
"What?"
"I'm still a virgin, I haven't got with every girl in the year."
"Good." I smile, pressing my lips to his. I really shouldn't be this forgiving, but I know Dan is serious. Dan drapes his arms around my neck and I place my hands on his hips. The smaller boy smiles at me when we pull away, and pulls me back down gently. I hear someone enter the room.
"Dan?" Jack asks. Dan gasps and lets go of me. "What the fuck?"
"Jack, I'm gay, okay." Dan says. I turn around and Jack strides towards me.
"Faggot." He spits at me.
"No, Jack! I won't let you hurt him!" Dan shouts. I gasp and try to control my breathing. "No more!"
"What's that on your arm?" Jack asks me. I realise my sleeve is still rolled up. "O-oh." Jack stutters. "Sorry." Is all he says before running out the bathroom. I shut my eyes, trying not to cry. Dan wraps his arms around my waist and rests his head on my chest.
"I promise they won't hurt you anymore." Dan mutters.
"People are different on the inside." I whisper.
"They are." Dan kisses me softly and I wrap my arms around his neck.
