Hello Internet ? Phan

Four

"Please.. Just leave me alone."

"Fucking Faggot Lester yet?"

"Quit calling him that. He did nothing to you."

"Shut up, Howell. And if you think calling the police will be able to help you, you better get rid of that ridiculous idea."
I cried.

"You don't have proof, little bitch." He hung up.

I fell into the fetal position, curled up in the corner of Phil's bedroom, crying. "No.. No... No...." I mumbled. "Fuck... I can't do anything about this.."

I heard the door to the apartment open and close as someone walked in.

"Dan? I'm back, love." It was Phil. "Dan?" He sounded worried when I didn't answer.

He peeked into the bedroom, seeing me in the corner. "Dan..." He hurried to me. "Dan, what happened?"

"Ja-James..." I stuttered. "I'm still getting hate.." I threw myself at Phil, clinging onto him. "He's gonna kill me.."

"Dan..." He tipped my head up by my chin. "No one is going to get to you." He kissed my head and rubbed my back as his arms were tightly wrapped around my body.

The threats continued for weeks....for months.

/

"Dan.. Baby.. We need to call the police."
Phil suggested. "This has gone on for far too long.."

I laid there in on his bed as he laid by me, brushing his hands through my hair.

"I can't... He'll be infuriated. He'll come after me whenever he possibly can."

"You're out for vacation next week, right?"

"Yeah, why?" I felt weak, too weak to answer his questions.

"I have vacation soon, too. We'll get this problem resolved then." He kissed me on the neck and wrapped his arms around me. "I love you."

"I love you, too Phil... I'm just so scared.. I'm exhausted from being brave.. I'm too weak."

"I'm here with you. You don't need to be brave." His voice projected a soothing melody as his warm breath hit my skin.

For a man with such a pale, cool complexion, his heart was pure gold and shone rays of sunshine and warmth. I felt safe in his arms, but each day when he left for uni, I was terrified.

The next day, Phil left for uni.
I turned my phone off and told my mum to email me while I wasn't using it. I stayed in his bedroom, on YouTube while waiting for Phil to come home.

I went to my channel, checking for subscribers and views.

Quite a lot... Wow.

I checked the comment section to see what reviews I was receiving.

"Hey Faggot Howell! Got a YouTube, huh? Nasty.."

"Ha! He thinks he can get a life now? Little bitch can't stay in the same place for more than a day."

"Uploading your homo ass sex tape? Can't wait to dislike it, and share it with all of your friends, prick."

"Oh wait, you don't have any friends! Fucking loser, go kill yourself."

I couldn't believe it... All of my tormentors from Berkshire. James must've told them that I was staying with Phil and I was on YouTube now.

I felt an urge to end the tormenting. My heart was pounding as I found a knife from the kitchen.

I was about to slit into my wrist when the door opened. "Dan, what the fuck are you doing?"

Phil ran towards me, arms out, wanting me to comply to his endeavor to help.

"They're everywhere, Phil. Everywhere. I can't hide." I panicked. "Let me go.. I'm better off." I cried harder and harder.

"God damn it Dan.." He picked me up and threw me onto his bed. He climbed on top and proceeded to kiss me as his hands went further and further away, lower than my belt.

"Dan. I never want you to think you're better off dead.. I have bloody schizophrenia and manic depression. I can't be worrying about everyone.."

"I know.." I whispered, choking back the emotion. "I cause all of this drama and I don't even say thank you for the service."

"Dan.. Shut up. You're not the cause of this. I'm not letting you take the blame for the shit people at uni say."

I looked at him, confused. Shit people say at uni? Phil, are you being harassed? People truly don't mature properly these days.

"What?" I asked, looking into his bright blue eyes.

"Yeah.. Um... People at uni saw my videos about you and I'm getting teased. It's nothing."

"Philly, that's not nothing.."

"What am I supposed to do, Dan?"
I looked at him, painfully thinking of a way to answer him. I saw an opportunity to distract him from his depression.

"Love me.." I said.

"I do love you." He tackled me and sucked on my neck as my arms wrapped around his own. Our tongues played tag as Phil's hands grasped onto my upper thighs.

I was only almost sixteen...yet so much happened to me that I couldn't explain....even to myself.

I had met a guy I watched on YouTube for a year, and fell madly in love with him. I was just lucky enough to have him be in love with me, too.

Something was bound to go wrong eventually.