In My Life

CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

I don't know why, but suddenly I don't feel like fighting anymore. It's like my body has abandoned its will to live. I'm done. Literally.

Struggling hurts.

Fighting hurts.

Breathing hurts.

Basically, living hurts...

"Do it," I let out, not even able to look the guard in the eye.

He swallows crooked.

"Pardon me?"

"Do it," I repeat. "Pull the trigger. I can't do this anymore."

There's a pause. Silence. I can hear him breathing not far from me.

"What makes you want to die?" he finally asks.

I hunch my shoulders, a single tear slowly gliding down my cheek.

"The world, I guess," I reply.

"Crazy world, isn't it?"

I shake my head.

"Not a crazy world, officer," I correct. "Just crazy people living in it."

I suddenly hear him cock his gun. This is it. He's going to do it. And I'll finally be free...

For the first time, I look up to him. His jaw is clenched but his eyes are fixed on me, almost gleaming.

"What's the problem?" I ask. "Just pull the trigger."

I notice his hand trembling. Why is that? He shouldn't be nervous. Moments ago he would have gladly pulled the trigger. But now...

"Officer, just do it, please."

"I... I..." he stutters. "I can't."

"You'll be saving me," I reply.

I look him right in the eyes.

"Save me," I plead. "Save me from this world. Please."

He aims his gun at my chest as I close my eyes, waiting for the blow. And then the gunshot is heard and everything goes black...

//

"Eponine!" I hear.

Shuffling sounds are heard as I hear someone drop to the ground next to me. I think there's pressure being put on my chest.

I try to breathe but my body isn't responding. I can't even open my eyes. I think I'm choking on my own blood.

"Eponine, come on!" I hear the voice cry out.

Pumping. Yes, the person is pumping my chest. My head hurts so much. It's like it's being squished to the ground.

"Eponine, don't you dare leave me!"

I recognize that voice. I think it's Marius... Yes, Marius Pontmercy.

"Don't leave me!" he cries again.

But I want to, Monsieur...

I'm finally able to open my eyes and see that Marius is gone. I blink again but no, he's not there anymore.

"Monsieur?" I try.

Okay, I'm able to talk. I sit up and immediately know something's wrong because... I'm fine. No blood. No headache. No trouble breathing. Nothing.

"Monsieur?" I try again.

"'Ponine," I suddenly hear.

I spin around and immediately gasp at the person standing before me. I try to shake the hallucination away but it doesn't work. He's still there.

"'Parnasse?" I say in a whisper.

He just smiles and extends his hand. I grab it without hesitation as he helps me up and starts pulling me towards the end of an alley.

"'Parnasse, where are you taking me?"

"To the barricade," he simply replies.

I look up to the sky and see that's it's completely blue, not a cloud in the sky. The sun is shining bright all over the city.

"Not the city," Montparnasse says as if he was reading my mind. "The world."

We turn the corner and my jaw instantly drops. Because right there, in the middle of Paris, is the biggest barricade I have ever seen. And on the very top stands Monsieur Enjolras, waving a red flag.

"Are you ready?" Montparnasse asks me.

I look back at him.

"Ready for what?"

"To see what's beyond the barricade."

I look behind me but no one's there. I nod to myself and tighten my grip on Montparnasse's hand.

"Let's go," I reply.

We start to walk towards it as I hear someone yelling my name far, far away. The bottom of the barricade opens up as a blinding light comes out, illuminating everything around. But it doesn't hurt my eyes.

I look back one last time to the world and smile. I'm coming home. This is my home now. And it will stay like that for all eternity.

I hear the people sing.

I hear the distant drums.

This is the future I will bring when tomorrow comes.

I look one last time behind me. The roads are deserted. I look back towards the barricade and notice that Montparnasse is gone.

I take a deep breath and close my eyes. And then I take a step forward and follow the music of the people who are climbing to the light.