Searching for him.... (Dan Howell x reader) ??

hiya!! this is a chapter a lil longer because i was just FEELING IT once i got going,, it was a little difficult to start off because i didn't know exactly how to make it not move too fast but i wanted to move on y'know??? anyways i really like this chapter and we're finally starting to get into the ~spicy~ stuff

-rya
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Your eyes were open.

"Holy fuck, holy hell, holy crap, what the fucking bloody hell!" Dan gradually got louder with each word, panic fading and being replaced with relief, then waning back in with panic. His chocolate coloured eyes bore into yours and you could see they'd glossed over. His hair was ruffled and curly, under his eyes was a bruised shade of purple. He had a crimson cut on his bottom lip, a gash on his forehead. His cheeks were tinted red and stained with tears.

"W-what the h-hell ha-happened t-to yo-y-you?" You croaked out. He smiled slightly, just enough for his dimples to appear.

"Holy hell, you're alive," he breathed out. He shifted his hands to pull you up and into his chest, holding onto you as if hid life depended on it. Your lips turned up in a small smile and you melted into his chest. You felt his chest rising and falling as he cried. You wanted to close your eyes, your body yearned for it, but you were too afraid. Afraid they wouldn't open again. So you listened to his short, shaky breaths and his heartbeat as they both slowed, his grip still strong on your back.

You enjoyed this.

You realised, at that moment, what you'd been denying all along.

You loved him.

Crap.

Dan shifted his hands and brought your body up, your faces inches from his. Just a little nudge, and his lips would be pressed against yours. A little nudge.

"You scared the fuck out of me," he whispered, "I thought-" he had to pause. There was pain evident on his face. "I thought I'd lost you."

You moved closer to his face, his lips, centimetres away from a kiss. You brought his arm away from your back and slipped your hand into his. It was rough, calloused, but yours fit in perfectly. Your fingers intertwined and he squeezed your hand softly.

"You'll never lose me," you whispered. He smiled softly. He leaned in even more. Your stomach flipped, filling itself with butterflies. This was it. You wanted to close the gap badly.

"Y/N!" Phil yelled, startling you. Dan jumped. He let go and Phil grabbed your hands, pulling you up and capturing you in a hug. You looked back at Dan, who look thoroughly annoyed. You grinned and Phil released you from the hug.

"Don't scare us like that!" He said, grinning childishly.

"Okay, Phil, I'll try not to almost die again," you smirked. He punched your arm playfully, and you caught sight of F/n. She suffocated you in a hug.

"I'm fucking mad at you, Y/n! You're the biggest idiot in history, I'd slap you if I weren't relieved you weren't fucking dead!" She started yelling, but soon just squeezed you so hard you couldn't breathe. When she let go, you took a deep breath.

  You looked over to see Rya and Justin sleeping, Rya clutching onto Justin's hand. You smiled, and looked back over at Dan. He reached out his hand in an attempt to grab yours, grinning widely. You rolled your eyes playfully, ever so slightly, and grabbed his hand. He pulled you down into his lap and laughed, wrapping his arms around you. You laughed as well. He leaned in to whisper in your ear.

"We'll finish what happened earlier later."