Be mine {Deadpool x reader}

Spider-Man and I were racing to big papa's pizza. " I'm first"!!! I yell while throwing my fist in the air. " yeah yeah what ever". Spidey pouted. "Hey I will still pay for the pizza". I spoke feeling bad. " hell yeah". Spidey jumped up into the air with excitement.
 
    Time skip
"Thanks for paying". Spidey said swing off your. "Your welcome"! I yelled as I walked off. I was walking for a while until I saw smoke coming from my street. "What the hell". I muttered under my breath. I ran there to see my house on fire while a man with a red suit on walking out with a pile of clothing and other important stuff. "Omg my stuff". I said as I ran to the man. "Oh hey hot stuff I saved some of your stuff". He said to me. " ugh where am I supposed to stay now". I cried.  "Well you could stay with me". The man said looking at me. " really thank you"?!?! I praised him.
Time skip
You walk into his apartment and it was so gross the wallpaper was falling of there was trash everywhere. "Hey hottie if you like you can sleep with daddypool"! Hw what you assumed winked at you. "Yeah I'll take the couch". You said it wanting to sleep with that creep. He pouted like a Chile as he sat on the couch but this gave you an idea. "Maybe one day daddypool". I lied to him to get his hopes up as I sat on his lap. "Hell yeah"!!! He said trowing his fist in the air. "Haha you really thought I would do that". I said laugh my butt off. All he did was look down at his crouch. "Wow just wow"
He said surprised. " man your still hot". He said looking at his crouch. "I'm sleeping on your bed you can have the couch tonight and have fun with you boner". I said skipping away to his. Room.