Daring to be Dauntless (A Divergent Fanfiction)

“So everything is in order?” Eric says; his hands tied behind his back. Dauntless is fading away as we swing around to slide by Erudite. The lights will be kept on tonight. Time is running out and every minute is necessary. 

“We are on track yes. Those who are willing to contribute though are uncertain.”
“How’s that,” he asks.
We stand side by side, looking out of the open train door. It smells fresh; the air crisp and cold as it whips at my bare skin. It almost feels like nothing is wrong.
I almost forget to answer but when a little too large leather jacket is dropped onto my shoulders I shake myself.
“We have the new initiates who are eager to be of any help. Their loyalty though is untrustworthy.” I shake my head. “Like for instance, Caleb Prior. He’s smart and kind, but knowing that he still was a former Abnegation…would you allow him to help destroy his home?”

“Of course not,” Eric says.
“Would you even trust him with the knowledge of it?” I look at him tensely. My bones have finally frozen in place and my body goes ridged.
“He wouldn’t even be a choice,” he says looking hard at me.
I shrug. “But…” I say shortly.
“He is eager to help with the plans, and he isn't even aware of what the project is; he's very willingly in fact. He stays up late with me, working on his initiation studies hoping that maybe we will allow him some sort of knowledge”
“I don’t agree with that.” Eric shoves his hands in his pockets and breathes in deep. For a while he doesn’t let it out but when he does it’s very loud.
“Jeanine trusts him minimally.”
He nods quietly.
For a long time we stand there waiting for the train to head back to Dauntless but before it can we pass through Abnegation. All the lights are dimmed in the grey houses. Children who have not chosen yet are probably just getting home from school and parents from work. I remember waiting for my mother to get home, to help me with homework since Caine was of no use and Tobias was equally as stumped.
I’d tried to keep in my excitement as she’d walk in the door. I always ended up jumping into her arms and begging her not to leave again.
Marcus on the other hand was different. He’d walk in and Tobias would try to shrink into a corner. I don’t blame him. He had a way of scaring people off when he returned from work.
I see our old house in the distance. The house where all the bad memories of the fierce beatings and cruel words were born.
I think Eric caught me staring because he snorts.
“Take a long look, because in a couple weeks, it won’t look like this anymore.”
Could I punch him?
Hit him so hard he wouldn’t wake up.
Bad idea, he’d probably be faster, stronger, and would beat me to a pulp for even trying.

I balance myself as the train begins to work harder to get up a hill. It jostles back and forth knocking me to the side; I fall into Eric.
His arm glides around my waist as he catches me. I feel sick.
He laughs half-heartedly and pulls me down so we sit next to each other with our backs against the wall.

“You’re something else,” he whispers.
I look at him stunned.
“What do you mean?” I ask.
He runs a hand through his hair and looks at me. “Do I know you from somewhere?”
“No.” I narrow my eyes.
He laughs again, this time so it echoes through the train car. He pulls me closer so our arms are crushed into each other. “I know you from somewhere; I’ve seen you before. I just haven’t seen you in black or blue.”
I bite the inside of my cheek.
“The fire in your eyes proves you’re anything but Amity.”
I glare at him. I feel my hands shaking. I try to pull away but he pulls me back. His hand glides across my cheek and I close my eyes tight.
Don’t kiss me. Don’t kiss me. Don’t kiss me.

“Who are you?”
“I can’t tell you,” I whisper. The words were out of my mouth so fast I bit my tongue afterwards. He looked at me for a second before putting our foreheads together.
Oh God, someone help me.

“Don’t you trust me?” He asks. His breath steams my cheek. I bite my tongue again but I can’t just say No, I don’t.
“I don’t trust anyone,” I smirk.
“You can trust me,” he whispers again. His lips touch my cheek and I gulp. He grins bigger and leans in further. I pull my head back and he gets the hint.
“Have you ever been kissed?”
I know where this is going. A ploy to see if I am Candor, or if I’m Abnegation.
“It doesn’t really matter does it?”
“It does to me,” he pulls me closer again. This is not going well.
“I’ve been kissed,” I tell him.
He sighs and releases.
“Are you Abnegation?” His words actually shock me. I didn’t expect them to come out of his mouth, especially since I admitted to having been kissed, when abnegation barely hold hands or show affection in anyway.
“What makes you–-"
“Cut the act. I know you’re Abnegation. I knew it since you got here. You looked like a deer caught in headlights.”

“Anybody could be that way,” I say shortly. 

“No. We have an Abnegation transfer remember; when she came she looked startled, like you.”

I pinch my arm so hard tears well up in my eyes.
“I knew I saw you from somewhere.” He rests his hands on my shoulders. “You’re that girl.”

“So you're going to kill me now?” I say with a slight laugh.
He shakes his head and pulls my head to his chest. “Be Candor for one moment.” After a moment he continues. “Tell me your name.”

I exhale and breathe in another deep breath. I haven’t heard my real name in years except for that one moment with Ash.
“My name.” I wipe some sweat off my brow. The evening has spread over the sky and the world around us has fallen silent. The train has since stopped blaring its horns and now just quietly slides through the city.
“My name,” I whisper. “Is Magdalena Eaton.”