CONNOR ??

[Chapter-XIX]

"Connor is a crybaby."

"I said stop it."

"Connor is a crybaby." I ran out of the bedroom and to the living room.

"I have every right to have Connor's custody."

I never knew that decision would change my life forever.

CONNOR

I felt like I was going to break down at any moment. I have always thought that my Dad wouldn't give her custody over me.

"C-Connor--" Jaxon tried to say, but I ignored him and walked out of the room, running up the stairs to my bedroom.

I shut the door before I walked over to my bed, trying to hold back my tears at the same time.

I brought my knees to my chest and my hand to my mouth, in an attempt to try and stop the scream that was itching to escape my throat.

Are you going to forgive him? He let your mother have custody over you.

Because Mom was fighting him to have custody over me and he never thought that she would abandon me like she did.

Doesn't matter, if he never left you that day, then none of this would've happened.

He wasn't willing to leave me.

How do you know that?

I remember the day he left me.

You don't know anything. Don't forgive him, he caused you so much pain.

I gripped my head with force, trying to stop myself from screaming, but I couldn't. The tears exploded uncontrollably from my eyes; everything was becoming too much.

I cried until I had no energy left. Slowly standing up from my bed, I walked to the bathroom. I splashed cold water on my face and came back.

The pain felt like someone was stabbing me in the heart.

The door of my room opened slowly and Jaxon walked in. I could feel my heart racing as he made his way and sat down in front of me.

What if he hits you, because you ran away from him like that?

He had never hit me before.

Jaxon sighed, taking a deep breath and looking me in the eye before he spoke. "I never knew she would stoop so low. Being an alcoholic and drug addict, she was so lost in everything that she didn't even realize about your absence and abandoned you." He ran a hand through his hair and bit his lip, nervously.

"When she told me that she wanted custody over you I thought that maybe, just maybe, under all that hatred she cared for you. If I knew what she was going to do, I would have never left you." He told me, softly. "The mother is given the first preference if she wants the child with her."

"I-I c-can't believe..t-that's all true.." I said in between my cries. "H-How c-could y-you?"

"I was helpless..." He sighed. "I wasn't your only parent, Connor. Trust me, if I knew that she would stoop so low, I would never have left you."

Blank. That's all my mind was. I want to forgive him, but something at the back of my mind was telling me, I shouldn't.

You shouldn't forgive him.

You shouldn't forgive him.

"Stop it!" I screamed.

You shouldn't forgive him.

"I said stop it." I screamed, gripping my head.

"Connor--"

Don't. He caused you so much pain.

"Please stop it.." I whispered, before I broke down crying, once again.

For the first time in my life, someone has shown me love and I like that. I want to forgive him.

"I don't know.." I wrapped my arms around myself. "It's all too much." I said even though my arms were quaking with fear.

Listening to him, I understand, he wasn't the one to leave me willingly. Even Mom cared for me in the beginning years. She wanted to show her love and care and I would not lie, she tried her best for me but after getting jobless, she doesn't know how to handle the situation.

She got filled with anger, irritability and distress and I know, she tried so hard to find some job but finding a job is not having a cakewalk and sometimes, luck just doesn't hold us.

I remembered the dark circles under her eyes, her sleeping trouble and her face was usually filled with constant worry. As bad luck would have it, my Mom chose the wrong road.

It's my fate.

I felt Jaxon shifted a bit and wrapped his arms around me, pulling me to his chest. He rubbed my back silently.

The damage that has left me from the separation, I wonder if it could ever be filled.

With all the racing thoughts in my mind, I raised my head up to look at him and I saw him looking at me with more affection in his eyes than anyone has ever had shown towards me.

We parted from the hug and I quietly sat down, biting my lip and stared at my hands.

"Aren't you gonna forgive your father, Connor?" He leaned towards me, softly placing his two fingers under my chin and tilting my head so that I could look at him.

His words shocked me and I just stared at him, without blinking.

That's my problem. I forgive people, no matter how much pain they've caused me. I shouldn't forgive too easily, but I know how I would feel if someone didn't forgive me.

Don't forgive him.

He cares about me. I should give him a chance.

I felt like I was melting, as I looked into my father's eyes and saw how much love and affection, they held in them.

I reached towards him with my skinny arms and hugged him, him quickly hugging me back. I felt so relieved at the moment.

"I hate her. I hate her so much." I finally said, referring to my mom with so much pain and hatred in my heart. "She made my life a misery." I whispered.

As I was speaking those words, I didn't hear him say anything. He was listening to me willingly and emphasizing me with concern.

Suddenly, the door of my room opened, revealing Maverick. When he saw me hugging Jaxon, he gave me a murderous glare and slammed the door shut.

"This boy." Jaxon sighed.

"It's okay, Dad."

Tears brimmed his eyes and flashed with happiness.

"Do you know how long I've been waiting for you to say this?"

I hugged him tighter.

"I have missed you. I have missed you so much, Dad."

"I missed you more." He said while brushing my hair.

"Late at night, I've cried for you to come back." I whispered.

Dad softly pulled my hand and began to wipe my tears which were running down my cheeks.

"I don't wanna go back there."

"You're never going to go back there." He stated, placing a kiss on the top of my head.

I love you.
_____

A lot more to come about Connor's past. This is only a scene where I wanted to show you what happened in the family before and after the separation.

So, what are your views about the chapter? Please share them.

Q: Did Connor do the right thing by forgiving his Dad?

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