Asylum

Sam let loud sobs leave his mouth. All he wanted was someone to love him. How could Colby say that to him. Sam curled further into a ball, putting his hands over his ears tightly. The voices starting to come back to him. 

Sam tried to focus on his breathing, nonetheless failing. "Think of happy things.." Sam mutters to himself. He brings his arm down staring at it, the scars still prominent. He closes his eyes tightly, putting his head on his knees.

Sam wanted to curl up bed and listen to Colby's heartbeat. He wanted to run to Colby and cry into his arms. He knew he couldn't do that, he cried harder. He wanted his boyfriend. 

Colby sighed quietly. "I'm so stupid.." he mutters to himself. Colby stood up, putting Sam's clothes into the closet. He carefully sat back down. He knew he needed to fix what he said but he didn't know how. Colby was scared to open up to the blonde. He didn't want to be rejected. He looked at the bedroom door, sighing. 

Colby stood up, walking to the bathroom door. He put his head against the door. "My stepfather would hit me as hard as he can with a belt buckle..." Colby says quietly.

"W-what?" Sam replies, crying never faulting. "The scars on my back... he would hit me as hard as he could with a belt buckle.. it cut me.. left that scar..." Colby turns around and slides down the door.

"The first time he ever injured me he threw a lamp at me.. it missed but a piece came back and cut my cheek... I was 11... it was my birthday... so I... I ran... I ran to my best friends apartment... Brennen..." Colby said quietly, leaning his head against the door. Sam gasps quietly. 

"I knocked on his door and he told me that his brother, Jake didn't like me and that I couldn't come back... I ran to the roof of the building and a man followed me up... he tried to force himself on me so I panicked and pushed him... he tripped and fell over the edge..." Colby looked down, falling silent. 

Sam moved against the door, wiping the tears from his eyes. "That was the first person I ever hurt... and I don't regret it. I never will regret it. It was self-defense. What was I supposed to do? Let him do whatever he wanted to me? You want me to open up so here I am.. I have been let down my whole life.. I shouldnt have said that to you... and the truth is.. I'm terrified.  I'm terrified because I don't want to lose you.. im terrified of Brennen... im terrified that if I let you in.. you'll leave me.. like everyone else.." Colby explained quietly. Sam slowly stood up, unlocking the door. 

Colby stood up, looking at the door as it opened revealing the blonde boy. "I didn't know..." Sam replied, looking at the ground. Colby grabbed Sam's chin gently, lifting his head to look at him. 

"Chin up and smile, Sammy" Colby let his hand drop before giving Sam a sad smile. Sam wrapped his arms around his lover tightly, not wanting to let go.