aligned ? monsta x

f o r t y f i v e

"you're making a mistake... it is not what you think, let me explain."

she noticed his chest worked up. "i don't want to."

a frown appeared on her forehead as she stared at him confused. "are you saying you're breaking up with me? when you don't even know what's going on? are you letting me go just like that?"

he remained silent for a second, as if he was analyzing everything she was saying. "i've seen the way you look at him... and the way you look at me. you think i am a monster."

she swallowed hard at the mention of it. in a way, she could relate. "and you're trying to make people believe you're different from me but i know you boki... i know how you really are, since high school... and let me tell you, you're not fooling me." he turned around and walked with decisive steps towards his car and boki didn't know what to do, what to say to make him stop, to make him regret this whole break-thing. because when she mentioned it, it didn't look so devastating as it felt right now.

kihyun stepped inside the car and she felt his intense eyes still on her. the tears were now forming on her eyes and threatened with spill in any second.

the words were stuck at the back of her throat, she wanted to yell so many things at him, but he didn't hesitate in turning on the engine and driving away.

suddenly, a feeling of loneliness and sadness invaded her. she glanced back at the restaurant but there was still no sign of jooheon and maybe it was the right sign.

without hesitation, she started running, running towards the avenue and away from the restaurant. she didn't know where, but she knew for sure that it wasn't a good idea to encounter jooheon nor her mom in this state, especially when she knew she'd begin to cry in any minute.

minhyuk's break up had been devastating the first days, but she met jooheon the same night it happened, he was the first one to comfort her and later on, the same night she met again with kihyun. so getting over minhyuk hadn't been as difficult as she thought it'd be, because of them.

but now, seeing how kihyun left things and how he asked for the break, it really hurt her, and she knew that even if jooheon would try to comfort her, it wouldn't be possibly.

she spotted the shore in the distance and since it was pretty late, she could notice it was deserted, the perfect place to cry her heart out.

as soon as her feet touched the sandy ground, she let them flow, all the tears she'd been trying to keep for herself, flew like a river as her chest began to hurt.

she never wanted to break up with kihyun, and even if he just mention that this was a break from their relationship, she knew behind those eyes and his body talk, that it was over between them.

but why was she so devastated?

she really liked kihyun, but did she love him?

could she really give in the demands he made for her? stop seeing jooheon or hanging out with him just because it made him feel insecure?

she couldn't.

she couldn't bring herself to have the talk with jooheon about how kihyun asked her to stop hanging around him because he felt insecure about the friendship they shared.

she knew jooheon wouldn't understand such thing, and to be honest, she didn't understand it either.

so... she was all the way about denying her boyfriend such demand, that's why, in that moment she realized something very valuable for her, something she didn't know before tonight.