I'm Not The Only One (Scomiche)

"Cause I'm not a puppet. I will work against your strings."

Money On My Mind by Sam Smith

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Scott must not have heard me enter because his laughter only died down when he heard Alex say my name. He was on the couch, seated beside his boyfriend. He turned around and his smile disappeared for a split second, but the was quick to recover. He then flashed me his signature smile. "Hey, bab- bitch!"

"Hey, boys." I smiled weakly before I started walking towards my room.

"Have you eaten dinner?" Alex asked.

"Uhm, no. But I'm not really hungry." Cause I just lost my appetite.

"Why don't you join us? Pizza's on its way. We're also watching a movie!"

And third wheel on your date night? "Thanks, but I'm good. I'll just be in my room."

"Come on, it'd be fun. Besides, we haven't hung out in a while," Alex said sweetly.

I wanted to yell at him and tell him that the reason I can't be around him was because I was having an affair with his boyfriend, or at the very least make a face because I hated what I was seeing. Somehow I managed to control myself.

But then Scott had to speak up. "Maybe next time then?"

Oh, so you're trying to push me away? Is that your way of telling me to go hide in my room while you have a romantic night with your boyfriend in our living room? "You know what, pizza actually sounds nice. Let me change. I'll be back in a bit."

Scott's eyes widened but he said nothing.

Ha. Take that.

"We'll start the movie in 10 minutes," Alex said.

I headed for my room and changed into something more comfortable. While in the bathroom, I splashed water on my face and looked at my reflection on the mirror. Don't be stupid, Mitch. Stay in your room. Or leave the house. Why are you torturing yourself? I sighed as I collected the blanket and pillow from my bed. I knew I was being a masochist by going back and actually letting myself watch the man I love spend time with his boyfriend, but a part of me also wanted to punish Scott. Ruin his date night. He might not suffer like I would but if it would make him at least uncomfortable, then I was happy with that.

My mental debate took a while that when I came out, the living room was already dark. It was illuminated only by lights coming from the flat screen and our bunny lamp.

I instantly regretted my decision to join when I saw Alex curled beside Scott, his head resting on Scott's shoulder. What did you expect, Mitch? For them to sit on opposite sides of the couch? It was nothing I haven't seen before but jealousy surged through me. No, stop. You don't have a right to feel that way, remember that. You were the one who wanted this, right? Deal with it. Before I could change my mind, I walked over to where Scott and Alex were.

I took the spot beside Scott and made sure there was minimal distance between us. I sat Indian-style and put the pillow on my lap before covering myself with the blanket. I focused my eyes on the screen and away from the nauseating couple beside me. The pizza better be worth it.

We watched in silence for around 15 minutes. I barely understood the movie because the whole time, I couldn't help but look at them from the corner of my eye. They looked so chill, so relaxed in each other’s arms, while there I was with a green monster inside me eating away at every fiber in my being. See, Mitch? You’re the only one affected. Your stupid plan just backfired. I was about to leave when the doorbell rang.

"I'll get it," Alex said, standing up.

As soon as Alex's back was to us, Scott turned to me. "What are you doing?" he hissed.

He noticed after all. "Trying to watch a movie with my best friend and his boyfriend," I shot back.

"Mitch, don't do this," he said sternly.

"I want pizza," I simply said. I saw Alex heading back towards us. "Speaking of, here it is!" I said a little louder.

I was actually genuinely happy that the pizza arrived. It smelled delicious and I was hungry. Alex set the boxes on the coffee table before serving a slice each to Scott and I. He got a piece for himself then sat back on the couch, and we resumed watching the movie while eating.

“Sandra, can you pass me the soda?” I whispered to Scott after a couple of minutes.

He leaned forward and grabbed a can from the table. When he handed it to me, I deliberately brushed my fingers against his.

Despite the dim lights I saw him purse his lips and narrow his eyes at me. I smiled back innocently but deep inside, the little green monster inside of me did a fancy perfect cartwheel.

The thrill didn’t last long. When I looked over to Scott, his head was resting on the back of couch and he seemed so… comfortable. I hated it. It took so much effort on my part to not show my feelings, to pretend that I was okay while he, on the other hand, made it look so easy.

I leaned over and whispered softly in his ear, “Do you know what I want to do right now?”

He tried to lean away but I gripped his shoulder with my free hand and held him in place.

“I want to kiss you. On the lips. Long and hard until you’re out of breath. I want to run my tongue on your neck and go down until I reach your -”

Scott coughed several times, obviously faked.

“Honey, are you okay?” Alex asked as he gently rubbed Scott’s back.

He’s okay. He’s just choking on his own guilt. I leaned back and crossed my arm over his chest. I watched as Alex gave him water.

For the rest of the movie I kept my mouth shut and my hands to myself. I thought about retreating back to my room but I wanted to piss Scott off so I stayed. If I’m pissed then I’ll at least make sure you are, too.

Thirty minutes later the couple was saying their goodbyes. I anticipated what was coming. I tried to go into my room but I was too late.

“I love you, honey,” I heard Alex say to Scott.

“Love you, too, hon,” was his reply.

I shut the door to my room. I covered both my ears but their words kept ringing in my ears. I closed my eyes but then all I could picture was them wrapped up in each other’s arms, kissing… and it was too much. I rushed to the bathroom and headed straight to the shower. I didn’t bother turning on the heater. I let the cold water run through my body and send chills all over in the hopes that it could wash away the pain. Or at least numb me. Or make me forget. Or help me wake up from the bad dream I’ve been living.

However all I got was a shivering body and sneezing fits after that. This sucks so bad.

I put on clothes and got under the sheets. I tossed and turned in bed but sleep never came. An hour and a half later, there was knocking on my door.

I honestly didn’t expect him to come, not after what I just did. But there he was, walking over, the way he did most nights when he wasn’t sleeping over at Alex’s.

“Mitch…”

Not baby? Oh no. I’m screwed.

And basically that’s what happened - I got screwed that night. Not passionately, not lovingly. Just… fucked. Punished by Scott in his own way.

I woke up late the following morning with a sleeping and naked gorgeous blonde wrapped all over me. Despite all that happened the previous night, there was one thing that was enough to give me a huge grin. He stayed. I took a moment to enjoy his warm body against my skin before I climbed out of bed. I picked up and put on my underwear on my way out. I walked to the kitchen and found three Starbucks cups sitting on the kitchen counter.

Aside from Scott and I, only one other person has a key to our apartment.

Shit.