Jeremy: I need a tissue
Michael: I have a gay one
Evan: Like, even if you haven't licked that wall you still know what it would be like.
Jared: Bold of you to assume I haven't licked that wall.
Rich: Have you had a shower or is that just sweat?
Jake: WHY DID YOU SNIFF IT?!?
Jeremy: *freaking out when the squip first enters*
Jake (To Christine): Ignore the senile woman
Christine (On two separate occasions):
Essentially, cats are like Americans.
...
Seagulls. They're sort of like entitled Trump supporters.
Alana: 我爱猫
Evan: What does that mean?
Alana: I love cats
...
Zoe: ... that translates to "I love pussy"
Jeremy: In all the other group chats I'm in it's all nice stuff, but the people here have random shit like "ITS FROM JAPAAAAAAAAAN"
Rich: I feel called out
Michael: Don't question Shaun the Sheep
Rich: Shaun is gay