tw: you'll find out ;)
January 3
I wake up with one thought in my head.
Today.
I stare at the ceiling, my heart pounding so hard I can hear it in my ears. My whole body feels electric—like I'm running on some kind of adrenaline-fueled high, but I'm also one second away from passing out.
Because today is the day.
The day I ask Lover to be mine forever.
I turn my head. She's still asleep beside me, her hair messy, lips parted slightly, breathing soft and even. I swear she looks more beautiful every time I see her. It physically hurts how much I love her.
And today, I get to ask her to spend the rest of her life with me.
I should be relaxed, but I'm not. My body is wired. I feel like I'm going to vibrate out of my own skin. I need to calm down before she wakes up and—
Lover shifts, stretching with a little hum before her eyes flutter open.
"Morning," she mumbles, voice still heavy with sleep.
I try to act normal. I fail.
"Hi," I say too quickly.
She blinks at me, then narrows her eyes. "...You're still being weird."
"What? No, I'm—" I clear my throat. "I'm completely normal."
She lifts an eyebrow. "Mhm."
I can feel the heat rising to my face. "Anyway," I rush out, sitting up. "We're going out today."
She groans, rolling onto her stomach. "Why do you have so much energy in the morning?"
I don't, actually. This is all pure nerves.
But I just smirk and lean down, pressing a kiss to the back of her neck. "Because I get to look at you all day."
She huffs out a sleepy laugh, but I catch the way her face softens.
She has no idea.
We get Starbucks first because I know Lover will not function without caffeine. I get my usual, she gets hers, and we sit in the car for a second while she sips it, slowly coming to life.
"...Okay, I feel human again," she sighs, leaning back in her seat. "Where are we going?"
I grin. "It's a surprise."
She side-eyes me over her cup. "Rep."
I start driving before she can press me further. She just watches me, suspicious as ever, but sips her drink and lets it go.
For now.
I pull into the parking lot of a nail salon, and Lover blinks. "...What?"
I grin. "You're getting your nails done."
She turns to me, confused. "I—why?"
I shrug, trying to act casual. "Because I thought it'd be nice."
She stares at me. "...Are you getting your nails done?"
"Nope."
Her eyes narrow. "Then why am I—"
"Because you deserve it," I interrupt, looking at her seriously. "Just let me do something nice for you, okay?"
She softens. "...Fine."
I hop out of the car before she can question it anymore.
An hour later, Lover has fresh nails—a soft pink color with little sparkles that she picked herself. I stare at her hand as she holds it out, admiring them.
"...Pretty," I say.
She gives me a look. "You're so weird."
I just smirk. "Come on, I'm not done with you yet."
She groans dramatically but follows me back to the car.
I take her to a boutique next, one I know she loves.
"...Okay, what are we doing here?" she asks as we step inside.
"You're picking out a dress," I say simply.
She frowns. "Rep, what the hell is going on—"
"Just trust me," I cut in, looking at her with a small smile. "Pick out whatever you want. I'll help."
She hesitates but nods, and we start looking through the racks.
She pulls out a couple dresses, holding them up to herself. "What about this?"
I wrinkle my nose. "No."
She scoffs. "Wow, rude."
She holds up another. "This?"
I tilt my head, considering. "...Maybe."
Lover catches me staring at her for the fourth time in the last ten minutes.
And I don't mean like a casual glance. I mean full-on, completely zoned out, jaw slightly slack, staring at her like she's the only thing that exists in the universe.
Which, to be fair, she is.
Still, it's starting to get me in trouble.
"Rep," she says, raising an eyebrow as she crosses her arms. "What the hell is going on with you today?"
I blink. "Huh?"
She scoffs. "You're acting so weird. You keep staring at me like you've never seen me before."
"That's not true."
She levels me with a look.
"...Okay, it's a little true," I admit.
She shakes her head. "You're up to something."
I plaster on my most innocent expression. "What? No."
"You so are."
"I so am not."
She narrows her eyes. "Rep."
"Lover." I mimic her tone.
She groans, but I see the amused twitch of her lips. "You're hiding something."
"I'm not hiding anything," I lie effortlessly. "I just think you're really pretty today."
She squints at me, skeptical. "Uh-huh."
She doesn't believe me.
I need to be more convincing.
I sigh dramatically and step closer, brushing my fingers against her waist. "Is it a crime to admire my girlfriend?" I say, tilting my head. "Because if so, then lock me up."
She lets out a breathy laugh but quickly schools her face back into suspicion. "That's cute, but it doesn't explain why you've been acting so strange."
I lift an eyebrow. "Strange how?"
She throws her hands up. "I don't know, you're just... extra today."
I smirk. "Extra how?"
She glares. "Don't be annoying."
"I have no idea what you mean," I say, feigning innocence.
She groans and turns back to looking at the dresses. I exhale, thinking I'm in the clear—
And then she says it.
"You're acting like you're about to propose or something."
My body locks up.
Every single muscle in me freezes, my breath catching in my throat.
She was kidding. She was completely joking. She didn't mean anything by it—
But I react like she just exposed my entire plan to the world.
"What?" I blurt out, too loudly.
Lover blinks at me. "Uh—"
"No!" I say, still panicking. "That's crazy! Why would you even—? That's insane!"
"...Rep—"
"Proposal?!" I laugh way too hard. "That's—wow. What a concept."
She just stares at me.
I clear my throat. "Anyway, no. Not at all. Not happening. No proposals. Zero proposals in the foreseeable future. Just a regular, normal, not-at-all suspicious day."
She squints at me. "I was joking."
I swallow. "Right."
"...But now I really think you're up to something."
I shake my head aggressively. "I swear I'm not."
She gives me a long, long look.
I hold my breath.
Then—
"...Whatever," she mutters, going back to the dresses.
I exhale, my entire body unclenching.
That was too close.
But Lover is still watching me out of the corner of her eye.
And I know I have to be more careful for the rest of the day.
Then—
She finds it.
A stunning, elegant dress in a shade that makes my heart stop. It's simple, but perfect. I can already picture her in it, already know she's going to look breathtaking.
She holds it up. "What do you think?"
I swallow. "You have to get that one."
She blinks at me. "Really?"
I nod, too caught up in her to say anything else.
She smiles, running her fingers over the fabric. "Okay. Yeah. I love it."
I exhale, my nerves twisting tighter.
She has no idea she's going to be wearing that dress when I propose.
I must be staring too much because she glances at me and laughs. "You are so weird today."
I smirk. "You're so pretty today."
She rolls her eyes, but I catch the way her lips twitch up.
I can't stop myself—I step closer, tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear. "You're gonna look beautiful in that."
She tilts her head at me, suspicious. "You're up to something."
I raise an eyebrow. "I always think you're beautiful. That's not suspicious."
She gives me a long look before huffing. "Whatever. I'm getting it."
I smirk, satisfied.
The whole day, I can't stop staring at her. Every little thing she does—tucking her hair behind her ear, biting her lip in thought, stretching her arms over her head—just cements what I already know.
She's it for me. She's been it since the day I met her.
And tomorrow, she'll finally know it too.
I can't breathe.
Lover is standing in front of the mirror, curling her hair, completely unaware that I'm about to change both of our lives forever. She looks so fucking beautiful, and I can't stop staring, which is a problem because she keeps catching me.
"Okay, what is with you?" she asks, setting down the curling iron and turning toward me. "You've been acting weird for days, and now you're just standing there, watching me like a damn creep."
I shake my head quickly. "I just love looking at you. You're gorgeous."
She narrows her eyes. "Mhm. No. This isn't normal staring, this is weird staring."
"It's admiration," I say, trying to sound smooth.
"It's unsettling," she shoots back. "And the last time you acted this weird, you had a concussion, so now I'm worried."
I snort and walk up behind her, wrapping my arms around her waist. "I'm fine, I swear. I just... It's a special night.*"
"Right. Because dinner at your mom's is so special." She tilts her head at me. "What's the occasion?"
I shrug. "I just felt like getting dressed up with my girl. Is that a crime?"
"No," she says slowly. "But it is suspicious."
I press a quick kiss to her shoulder. "Come on," I murmur. "We don't want to be late."
But the whole time, my heart is slamming against my ribs.
The car ride is tense.
I keep tapping my fingers against the wheel, and Lover, of course, notices.
"Okay, seriously," she says after a few minutes. "You're being so fucking weird."
"I am not," I argue, but my voice cracks, and she pounces on that immediately.
"Are you nervous? Why are you nervous?"
"I'm not nervous."
"You're literally sweating."
I wipe my hands on my pants. "No, I'm not."
She stares. "Rep."
"Lover."
She studies me for a second, and then her eyes widen. "Oh my God, are you pregnant?"
I nearly swerve the car off the road. "What?! No!"
"Then what the hell is going on?"
"Nothing!"
"Liar."
"Jesus Christ, I am not pregnant, Lover."
She hums, unconvinced. "I don't know... you've been acting all mysterious, getting emotional out of nowhere, staring at me like you're imagining our future kids..."
I groan. "Please shut up."
She just grins. "Fine. But you're still being weird."
I grip the wheel tighter. Just a few more hours.
When we pull up to my mom's house, I feel like I'm going to throw up. I can see her through the window, already watching for us, and I know she knows what's happening tonight. She was so excited when I told her. But I also know she wasn't expecting him to be here.
And yet, when we walk up to the door, there he is. My dad.
I stop dead in my tracks. Lover keeps walking until she realizes I'm not beside her, and then she turns. "What—"
"Mom," I whisper sharply, stepping closer to her. "What the fuck is he doing here?"
She squeezes my hand. "I promise, he's changed."
I highly doubt that. But Lover is standing right there, looking at me in confusion, so I have no choice but to plaster on a fake smile and pretend everything is fine.
Even though I know it won't be for long.
Dinner is awkward as hell. My dad is sitting across from me, making my skin crawl, and I don't miss the way he keeps glancing at Lover. I don't think he even remembers who she is, but he knows she's here with me, and that's already too much for him to handle.
I glance at my mom, who nods, phone ready. It's time.
I take a deep breath and stand up. Lover furrows her brows as she watches me. "What are you doing?"
My mom lifts her phone, and that's when Lover really starts looking confused.
"Rep?"
I turn to her, and suddenly, everything else fades away. It's just her.
"Lover," I start, my voice shaking. "You have been in my life for almost twenty years. You have always been the most important person to me, even when I was too stupid to realize it. And now, I get to love you in the way I was always meant to. I want to do that forever."
Her eyes widen.
I drop to one knee, pulling the ring from my pocket.
"Will you marry me?"
She gasps, covering her mouth as tears immediately fill her eyes. "Oh my God."
I wait, my heart pounding, until she finally nods, choking out, "Yes!"
I barely get the ring on her finger before she's throwing herself at me, kissing me like I just gave her the world.
And then—
"You've got to be fucking kidding me."
The voice makes my blood run cold.
We both turn to look at my dad, who's staring at us like we just burned down his house.
"You're engaged?" he spits. "To a girl?"
My jaw clenches. "Yes. And if you have a problem with that, you can—"
"Of course, I have a problem with that!" he snaps, standing up so fast his chair nearly topples over. "Jesus Christ, I should have known you'd turn out to be a fucking dyke."
authors note: i have no clue if this is an offensive term, i got it online. if this is offensive or offended anybody reading, i am extremely sorry and i didn't mean it in an offensive way.
I tense, but before I can even respond, Lover steps in front of me. "Call her that again," she says, voice dangerously low. "I fucking dare you."
My dad scoffs. "What, you gonna fight me, sweetheart?"
Lover doesn't hesitate. She punches him in the face.
I swear, time stops.
He stumbles back, holding his jaw, and then he lunges. Lover doesn't back down, meeting him head-on as they fight. My mom is screaming, but I can't move. I can't do anything but watch as my dad shoves Lover hard enough to send her stumbling back.
He stands, breathing hard, and I swear I see him reach for something—
And then, suddenly, there's a gun in his hand.
"What the fuck—"
I barely have time to react before he aims it at me.
And Lover—Lover, who would do anything to protect me—throws herself in front of me.
The gun goes off.
She gasps.
I scream.
And then everything goes black.