"I am not anymore in this phase!"
I shout at my best friend.
"I swear, you are. And I don't like this phase."
"If it would be like this, why would you don't like this phase?"
"Chris, I already told you this once. Because these are fake feelings! You are only obsessed with the idea to be in love with her!"
Oh yeah, always a good idea to listen to William.
"But this phase is over, so don't worry!"
"Proof me, that this phase is over. Damn, never ever hurt your girlfriend, this is rule number one!"
I am mad and I could feel that my eyes burned.
My best friend doesn't believe me?
AGAIN?!
"How should I proof you this?! How should I show you that I am not crushing on someone?
Don't you see this? I have a girlfriend! This is proof enough. I love her with all my heart and fucking forget the idea, that I still have this phase to be in 'love' with Eva Mohn!
Chris and Eva is over! Eva and Chris is over!
Forever! Don't you see, that I am happy?
I am fucking happy, bro! I won, because I changed! I am not a fuckboy anymore and I have a heathly relationship! Don't dare again to say that I still have this fucking disgusting phase!"
I say and tears runs down my cheeks.
I cry in front of my best friend.
I know that I lied.
I am not in this phase, this is true.
Why? Because it was more than just a damn phase.
But William didn't believe me.
So I was the good friend, and believed him with 'not having feelings for Eva'.
"Chris, why are you crying then?"
"Because I fucking love Emma. Is this proof enough for you?"
"Yes, it's proof enough for me."
I nod.
"Proof enough for me, that you are crazy."
William says.
"Aren't we all crazy?" I ask him and roll my eyes annoyed.
"I don't know, are we?" He ask cold back and took his cigarettes out. "I have a question, Chris."
"What for a question?" I ask and look to the dirty ground.
"What if, when suddenly a random girl asks you for being in a relationship with her. Would you say that you are happy? That you have a girlfriend and that you love her with all your heart?"
"Of course I would."
"Right answer."
He hugs me. I still have tears in my eyes.
I am jogging around the area and hearing some music at the same time.
At the moment, I am always hearing to depressing music.
Christoffer, you little softie.
I try to distract me from everything with workouts for the army.
And with everything I mean Emma.
Because she is my everything.
Haha, so cheesy, Chris. You are so cheesy.
I check my phone for the time, and realise that in less than 2 hours my girlfriend has school end.
So I jogged home and showered.
Maybe I should surprise her with something today?
But what does she likes? I know nothing about her.
After the shower I went in my room and layed in my bed, thinking about what Emma would like.
Who the fuck should I ask for some advice?
Jonas? Again?!
No. Better not.
William?
No. He would thinks that I am a bad boyfriend, who doesn't even know, what my own girlfriend likes.
And to be honest: I am so done with William.
I love him as a bro, but he didn't believe me now for the second time.
First time, when I said I am in love with Eva, second time when I said that I am not crushing on Eva and that this 'phase', it is how he calls it, is over.
Isak? Wasn't he with Emma together too?
Maybe I should ask him?
But better no. He could tell that Jonas.
And if Jonas would find out, that I am asking again someone for advices, he would probably think that I am such a loser.
Eva?
Holy shit, no, no, no.
She doesn't want that I bother her.
Sana?
Sana!
So I will take her to the cinemas, later?
Okay.
I quickly texted Emma a message with:
"I will pick you up today, love you."
I stood up and went to the mirror in my room, to fix my still wet hair and put me new clothes on. For the end, I also sprayed a bit perfume on my chest and neck area.
Flowers? Flowers! I need flowers.
Since the thing with Eva, I had this weird thing with giving flowers to my girlfriend.
I am so happy that even Emma likes my flowers.
My phone buzzed from the corner in my room, so I took it and unlocked it.
I thought Sana was replying me, but it was someone who actually didn't want my attention.
I am dreaming, or did she really texted me this?
For one second, I am happy about Emma.
And in the next second, Eva can make me happier.
5