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I wrote this when I was 13 and I'm so embarrassed of it, I wanna delete this story so bad because it's actual trash but so many people like it so I'm keeping it up. I'm so sorry I wouldn't bother reading this my writing has improved so much. Philip Lester didn't believe in Love. Until He did. Daniel Howell loved love. He couldn't wait to meet his soul mate. Little did he know his soul mate was right in front of him. Warnings⚠️ Self harm mention, rape attempt, abuse, sexual content, and death Punk!Phil and Pastel!Dan Side Pairings: Kickthepj, Fack, Jyatt and Sophia Lillis and Jeremy Taylor Started: August 7th 2018 Ended: September 29th 2018

Dan Howell was the typical spoiled, rich boy with butlers driving him to operas and maids making him nachos for breakfast. Phil Lester, however, was the opposite. Barely any money and deadbeat parents, he lives in a bad neighborhood in a gross apartment with cat hair covering the carpet and an odd roommate. And then Dan's parents decide he needs to love someone rather than himself, and when Phil shows up at his mansion steps, Dan's parents grow fond of him- so much that the two are exchanging rings and Phil is moving in with his new spouse. They tell Dan he should give it a few months, to be patient, and if he still doesn't like him then they'll sign the divorce papers and call it quits. Marriage isn't perfect, right? Well this one is the exact example. But they could always pretend.

Dan is a prince - and a different one at that. Usually you'd think that being a prince is a dream come true, but not for Dan. He just wants a normal life, normal friends, maybe a boyfriend... Finally, he gets the chance to move to a place far away from his small kingdom and live with his Auntie Eleanor. The problem? He has to pretend that he's not a prince. Lying? He's not so great at that. But for someone who wanted a boyfriend but hated the idea of love, he never expected to actually fall in love. Phil Lester. The boy with the black hair, who actually likes Dan for Dan. And so Dan can't tell him that he's a prince in a place on the other side of the world - and he wants it to stay that way. Otherwise he'll have to move back home and never return. Will everybody find out? Will his chance at a normal life be ruined? Dan finds out that not everything is always normal, and most definitely, you can never avoid being one of those who love.

#1 Phan! It's Phil's first day at Uni and all he's expecting is a quiet uneventful year filled with a lot of school work, new friends, and opportunities for his future. However everything that he thought he knew changes when he meets Daniel James Howell, hands down the most beautiful person he has ever seen, Dan intrigues him from the very start. Dan however, wants nothing to do with Phil, he's hiding a few secrets of his own and he seems to want Phil as far away from him as possible. But when destiny pulls two people together, sometimes it's best not to stay away. Warnings: sexual content M/M, abuse, assault, homophobia

"Phil Lester is the literal sunshine of my life. If I didn't have him in my life, I may have been dead by now. Every day still sucks, but whenever I'm with Phil, my heart remembers that life is worth living. The only reason my life is worth living is to be next to Phil. To see him smile, to hear him laugh, to listen to his voice, to watch him move...everything. Everything that he does brings the much-needed light into my life." Dan Howell has many struggles within himself, despite his successful YouTube career. The only one who truly helps him is his best mate, Phil Lester. Dan has been madly in love with Phil since the first day they met. However, Dan knows that it is inevitable that Phil will never return the feeling because he is only interested in women. As Dan attempts to battle his own demons, Phil seems to be quite happy and even ends up dating a beautiful girl. Unfortunately, this makes Dan's mental state even worse. What will happen to Dan? Will he ever confess his strong feelings for his best friend? Will he ever overcome the ongoing war in his head?

Daniel Howell and Phil Lester have gone through a lot together. ***TRIGGER WARNING- SELF HARM / SUICIDE ATTEMPTS / DEPRESSION / HOMOSEXUALITY /SAD/ANGST***

In the perspective of Phil Lester (1-10) In the perspective of Dan Howell (11-20) ✹ You wouldn't think someone with such deep and sweet brown eyes would turn out to be so violent to love. I didn't believe it when he first smiled at me, but my perception of him changed the moment he started removing my belt. ✹ EXTREME MATURE CONTENT ✹ MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY ✹ If you are triggered by or sensitive to any of the following things, read with caution... -self harm -suicide attempts -domestic violence -rape -alcoholism -masochism (sexual desire with submission to cruelty or violence)

" For the first time I felt I saw Daniel Howell, the lonely boy who puts everything into his job so he can feel there are some people out there who will not leave him. And for the first time Dan saw me, Philip Michael Lester, the suicidal runaway who's constantly haunted by his regrets. The secretive boy that will never let himself get attached and hurt others. ,, ~ We Truly Saw Eachother - Chapter 24 ------------------- Aka: Phil's a ruthless crime-lord and the boss of the Mafia. The job's dangerous, so he can't really be bothered to make friends or relationships if he's just going to scare them or drive them away... But that doesn't mean he doesn't get lonely. Dan's a famous internet celebrity who spreads word about mental illness and brings joy to many lives. He values his image and career above nearly everything else, but that means he thinks he doesn't have time for relationships of any kind. Even before they meet, they impact each other, no matter how much Phil hates what he's done. Started: 9.10.18 (British date) Completed: 24.8.19 Edited: 18.10.19 - ??.??.?? TW: Robbery, Gangs, mugging, murder, crime, one-night stands, relationship and family abuse, multiple suicides, major character death, smut (optional and put in another book), kidnapping, minor character death, mental issues. The cover is completely my own artwork, so stOP ASKING

He darkened his hair with the gloves that came with the kit. Running his destructive fingers over his head. How could he be so reckless? Shaking his head as if for a split second he thought that would rid the terrifying thoughts that swam through it. Maybe the dye will kill his thoughts? If only it were that easy. Defeated Phil Lester runs from his past life hoping to find a peaceful new beginning. He is greeted by a quaint coffee shop nestled in the middle of a quiet town constantly plagued by rain. Soon he sets his eye on Dan Howell a young boy with an appetite for poetry and a hand for art. The fire in his eyes is unmistakable and Phil just hopes his blue sea will not drown the flames.

so basically if you've stumbled across this story i must warn you of suicide, self-harm, abuse, alcohol, language, and sex ;) so Phil gets assigned a new project for his astronomy class and instantly likes dan. Although his constant insecurities and troubled memories always cause him to believe that dan could never love him. Dan, though, has fallen for this sad boy and also believes that Phil couldn't like him back. then sad things happen, happy things happen, blah blah blah read it to find out if your reading it, i declare you awesome