what is he doing to me and why am i enjoying it?
y/n pov
there was a void in my heart.
a void in which only one could fill, i can try to fill it but my attempt would've been futile.
we complete each other.
each and every missing part within us we fill each other with something pure.
but we hurt each other. The pain is unbearable at times but it's almost addicting, the effects and the aftermath - once we find each other again.
we are aware of the reality that we can't be loved by someone else, maybe we are just having a hard time of accepting it.
we are stronger together, but in some cases we are better apart.
it'll be an unending cycle of :
pain
pleasure
love
affection
and neither of us can escape even if we tried ; it's inevitable.
pain is only for a moment.
you get used to dealing with it after every time it's inflicted
but love, love is for an eternity. no matter how much you convince yourself that you hate someone deep down in the valleys of your heart there is love for that person.
and that person who i should hate, but i can't is vinnie.
he's lied to me.
made me feel dirty when i was supposedly the other person he was cheating with.
i ran away, thinking i could escape something that'll always follow me wherever i go.
now i'm back.
it's killing me that we are apart
it's killing me that i can't feel his touch
it's killing me that i can't feel his presence close to me.
kieran.
he is innocent.
he is kind, even too kind.
his soul is too pure, i can't stay with him for longer because he doesn't complete me and i don't want to taint him : i don't want to stain his conscience with guilt, because it's not his fault. it's mine. for thinking i could escape reality.
vinnie couldn't have left. i know he hasn't. he wouldn't leave without closure, saying goodbye or even without me.
i unblock his number, i endured so much pain and guilt when i did block it, but now it was time for me to make contact - with meaningful words.
i love you vin.
we hurt each other and i ran with no explanation. the guilt and the pain it's killing me, i still haven't rid myself of those feelings because i can't, it will always be on my conscience and in my heart. i'm sorry for the pain i've caused but am i crazy to still be in love with you? am i crazy to still want to be with you? what we have - i can't explain it. simply because i don't know what it is exactly, all i know is that we have a deep connection and we are better together than we are apart. i don't want to run anymore, i want to face my feelings for you even with you. you're the only one that can complete me.
delivered
vinnie's pov
i can't bring myself to leave. not without an explanation. not without feeling her close to me. not without seeing her again.
a text interrupts my thoughts.
it's the one name i want to see.
it's the one name i'd never thought i'd be able to see again.
but here we are.
i read her message and i can feel her pain and guilt from her words. i can sense her sincerity from her words
i can also sense the truth when she said : i love you vin.
it's true. i feel the same way. we read each other, we feel each other's pain. we can't be apart for any longer.
i need to be close to her. i crave her touch. i crave her scent. i want to be the one to witness her happiness, a type of happiness that only i can provide her with.
so i text her back.
simply expressing my feelings
i feel complete when i'm with you. come back to me, i can't be away from you for any longer it's killing me. no, you aren't crazy, you've killed me in ways nobody can even imagine but my love for you clouds any bad actions. the pain i felt was unbearable, i simply can't live without you y/n.
i love you.
delivered
third person narrative
affection. pain. sadness. guilt. anger. love. passion. pleasure.
feelings when they are together. they are strong feelings whether good or bad, it doesn't matter, what matters is how they provoke these feelings within one another. that's what makes them strong, they strengthen one another even when they are weak.
they kill each other in the nicest way possible, to a point where it's addictive - the feelings they give each other. that's why they are better together than they are apart.
author note
okay i finally did this um i wasn't really sure how to finish it but okay.
exam season. sorry that's why i haven't been updating as often as i should
i have 1 request and i promise to get it done soon i've started drafting it, just bare with me for some time.
thank you for your patience
i love you all!
-jordyn.
