Remnants of Sephiroth X reader

I Told You So

"Uh," Kadaj hesitated, "I-I'm so sorry it's late." 
"Kadaj," He could tell by the tone of her voice that she was confused. "What's going on?" 

 He had just woken her up after hours upon hours of procrastinating. It was three in the morning, but he couldn't sleep, he could think, it was like his whole world was falling around him. Held up by one small pillar that looked about to crumble if this conversation didn't go well. Kadaj cleared his throat, but it was so dry that he feared he would choke. 

"It's been a while." A lame attempt to get the conversation rolling. 
"Yes." A short agitated answer, but at least she was speaking to him. 

He swallowed, of course trying to find the words when he was operating on no sleep was quite the challenge. What annoyed him the most was that he had scrapped many ways on how to bring this topic up in his head, because he deemed them not good enough. (Y/n) was important to him, even though he had a bad way of showing it. That's why he called her, he needed to tell her everything. 

"Kadaj, you never call to have a friendly chat. What do you need this time?" She asked, obviously annoyed. "Couldn't this have waited till morning?" 
"I know, I apologize." Kadaj continued, "But, I just wanted to talk about something. I thought this would be better than you having to see me." 
"If you came to that conclusion then why did you bother to call?" 
"In all honesty, I know it's not a good idea. But, I..I just need to tell you." Kadaj said, his palms starting to sweat. 

He understood why she was so hostile, hell, he couldn't blame her. With everything he did to her, he was surprised she even picked up the phone. 

"What do you need to tell me?" She asked, hearing her adjust. "Aren't you too busy with your 'mother'?" 
He could hear the resentment in her tone, under normal circumstances he would've been offended by what she said. But not now. No, definitely not now. 

"That's the thing," Kadaj looked up, the phone still pressed to his ear as he tried to subtly clear his throat. He paused for a moment, taking a small breath. "She's.." 

He stopped himself, his body hurt, his feelings hurt. Everything was just falling apart, he knew that everything that he and his brothers stood for was now gone. Now, they walked the earth with no mission and no purpose. They were lost. It was the fact that when he was in trouble, when he felt like slipping away and never to be seen again. He ran back to her, his (Y/n). If she wanted him. 

"We're not looking for her anymore." He finally spoke, taking a silent deep breath. 
"You're not?" She asked, he nodded but then remembered she couldn't see him. 
"Yeah." 
A small silence filled the line, Kadaj barely noticed. He was silent, still coming to realize that this was his life now. 

"How are you taking it?" She asked, her tone slightly sympathetic. 
"It's...it's tough." He nodded, "Yazoo and Loz aren't taking it very well." 
"They must be," She said, "But, how are you handling it?" 
He felt his heart speed up, he couldn't keep it together anymore. He already lost his purpose, he couldn't lose her too.

"I love you, (Y/n)." He abruptly said, those words burning a hole through his heart and finally falling off his tongue. "I-I know you probably don't want to hear that, because I already told you that and..left you after. But, I mean it (Y/n). I've always meant it." 

Which was true, he wasn't blind to his feelings towards her. Not even in the beginning, he always loved her since they first met. But, with one purpose, he didn't have much room for anything else. So, he told her he loved her, and she returned his feelings. Then, he left. With no word. He did that to her again, and again, coming in and out of her life like she meant absolutely nothing to him. 

"Kadaj, I don't know what to say." She said. Kadaj had fought hard to keep his feelings in check, but now everything was just spilling out. 
"I-I'm just so tired of spending my time alone," Kadaj said, "I finally learned my lesson." 

That lesson was that he couldn't just keep walking out of her life and expect her to wait for him. She used to do that, but after he kept doing it, she had to move on. Watching her move on without him was just as painful as losing his mother, because he knew she could be happy again even if he wasn't there. He could feel his eyes start to burn, he was about to cry. 

"I-I want to come back to you." He continued, "I realized that you're all I ever wanted and it's killing me to be so far away." 
"Kadaj-" 
"I-I'm yours forever if you want me. Just tell me you told me so and let me come back to you." 

Kadaj could feel his pride slip further and further away, he hadn't ever been this valuable before and in a way, it scared him. He could barely let her talk, he knew that going back to here was a long shot but he had to try. Her many possibilities that her response could nearly kill him, thinking she would laugh and hang up. Or, that she knew he would come running back to her. It was going to go one of two ways, she either shared the same feelings and was just waiting for him to come back or she didn't want anything to do with him. 

"Kadaj," She finally spoke, "I'm not going to say 'I told you so' because this was something you needed to find out for yourself." 
"It was." He agreed. 
"But, I'll say this." (Y/n) said, "I wanted you, I wanted you, Kadaj. Not who you thought you were, but the real you. But, you had to go." 
Kadaj could feel his heart sink, he knew where this was going. 

"I knew you'd come crawling back and ask for me to take you in." She said, softly. "I missed you, and I've been so lonely for you. But Kadaj, the tables have finally turned."
"What do you mean?" He hesitantly asked. 
"Now, I found somebody new and you will never break my heart in two again." (Y/n) finished, her tone wasn't condescending, it was honest. 

"I..I understand." Kadaj said. He didn't wait for her to respond, he just closed his phone and let it drop to his side. 

He clutched the side of his head, his breathing became heavier. He let out a loud, agonizing scream. He could hear Yazoo and Loz's voices from beyond his bedroom walls, he could hear them get up and nearly run to check up on him, obviously concerned. But he didn't care. 
Now, he had absolutely no purpose.