Can't Let You Go

Chapter 11

"Baby!" I make myself yell back in an approximation of a happy voice. If he's in a place where he's having fun, I don't want to immediately bring him down.

"Please tell me you have some good news!"

"Only if no news is good news."

He tuts in response.

"It's okay, I just have to keep waiting." I try to sound chipper for him. "I just missed you and needed to hear your voice. What are you doing?"

"I am in line at a no-rez restaurant that's supposed to have amazing maakouda batata. I'm with some bitches," he says that word with his mouth away from the phone. I hear laughter around him, "from school. We are going to die from carb overload tonight."

"Sounds fun. I wish I was with you."

"Don't worry. I have full confidence in the South Korean police investigators. You'll be back soon and if this place is as good as it's billed to be, I'll bring you here when you get home. Deal?"

"Deal. I won't keep you, I just needed a Zayan recharge. Have fun. I love you."

"Love you, too. Bye!"

I feel both better and worse after hanging up the phone. I start some laundry to occupy my hands, but exhaustion overtakes me. For the first time, I lay out the bedding in my room and have a restless nap until the washer's finished signal wakes me. I'm hanging the clothes to dry when Liam comes home for lunch, fast food in hand.

"I brought some American comfort food, if you're into that." He sets a box of famous fried chicken on the counter. "And some soup, if you're still feeling sick." He puts a plastic container of vegetable soup next to the box. "We'll just eat whatever is leftover for dinner. Sound good?"

I nod my head.

"I thought I gave you the day off. Why are you working?"

"I needed something to do. Besides, I took a nap."

"What did you do to occupy yourself before we met?"

"I don't know. Roamed around the city. Went to tourist spots. Ate. Drank. I cleaned my own place, but there wasn't much to that to begin with. It's been nice to have a task list."

"Did you do a lot of chores growing up?"

I laugh. "No. This is all quite new to me. I spent a good deal of time searching for English language instructions to run your clothes washer. Wrestling the drying rack also required a video lesson, but as you can see, I triumphed."

"Good job." He leans over and ruffles my hair like he did the other night.

The rest of Wednesday passes uneventfully. Liam goes back to work, I putter around the house. We eat dinner then take a walk together. Lights out at eleven and I fall asleep on the couch.

Thursday is a normal work day. I guess it's normal anyway, I've never actually been a housekeeper before, or had any job. And I guess waiting to hear from the police if you're going to be charged with a crime you didn't commit isn't exactly normal. Anyway, I do normal, boring things like prepare meals, go shopping, and start the task of cleaning all the windows.

When Liam returns home on Thursday he has a printout from the police station. It's a photograph captured by the ATM's camera. There's someone whose face is obscured by a mask, sunglasses, and a cap.

"Do you recognize him?"

"From this? No, how could I? How do you know it's a him?"

"I don't, really. The shape of the head seems masculine to me though. Don't you think?"

"I guess, maybe. It does seem a little large, but that's hard to judge without a lot of references."

"Anyway, I know how this is going to sound, but this is Korea. It's not very racially diverse." He pauses for a moment. "Have you noticed a black person, male or female, frequently in places you've been hanging out?"

"No, but I also haven't considered the possibility I was being followed before. I'll pay more attention from now on." I eat my food slowly and try to retrace my steps and mentally picture my surroundings over the past few weeks.

It starts raining while I'm cleaning up after dinner so Liam and I won't be taking a walk tonight. Instead we watch tv, though it's not that enjoyable for me since I don't speak Korean. Not enough to count anyway. Part way through the show, Liam gets down on the floor and starts doing push ups then other exercises. He is more enjoyable to watch, especially after he takes off his shirt, but I don't want him to know that, so I do my best to not look.

"I'm going to shower and get ready for bed," he says as he stands when he's done stretching. "Goodnight." There's beads of sweat on his body glinting in the multicolored light from the tv in the dark room.

"'Night," I reply and try to keep my eyes on the screen as though I'm really paying attention to the show.

I turn the lights out at eleven and fall asleep quickly.

"Hey," Liam says as he shakes my shoulder.

"What?" My voice is raspy from sleep.

"You fell asleep on the couch again."

"Yeah, I know." It seems to be the middle of the night, so I just roll over. "Good night."

"Hey." He shakes my shoulder again. "Get up and go to your bed."

"No. I prefer it out here. It's too dark in my bedroom, I don't like it." Crap. I just confessed that I'm afraid of the dark like a child. There's not even a good excuse, I just get creeped out by the empty feeling of being swallowed by ink.

Liam doesn't laugh or poke fun at me. "Suit yourself," is all he says.

I hear the quiet sounds of him pouring a glass of water and going back to his room. I'm a bit awake now since I mildly shocked myself with my big mouth. I've never told anyone about this fear. Emily knew I slept with a lamp on, so she may have guessed it, but I never actually said it out loud.