Trapped in my own head

If you ever asked me how I was doing,
I would just put up a bright smile
and say, I'm okay.
It's not because I don't trust you,
I just... I just don't wanna be a burden.
I don't want to soak the sleeve of your shirt
with my flooding tears,
I don't want you to have to put up with my gloomy cloud,
I don't want you having to clean up the mess in my life,
I don't want you to feel like you are responsible to make make my life better,
I just don't want you to fix something that you didn't break.

Please don't think that I'm pushing you away,
or that I'm pulling away.
You are a happy person,
a sun.
And I don't want my downpour
affecting you in any way.