Savior | ?*REWRITE*? MELLO X OC

Chapter Seven: There's No Monsters

Deciding to get up, I paced around my bedroom with the light on trying to calm my nerves. Sweating bullets and shaking like a leaf, my brain felt like it was short circuiting.

The walls in my new bedroom were bland, but not worn down and gross like my previous room. That sort of comforted me knowing I wasn't in the same 4 walls where abuse took place.

But it didn't calm me down enough to keep me from having nightly panic attacks, it just doesn't work that way. The nightly crying, shaking & nausea was getting old fast, I could barely even eat because of it.

It had only been a few days since we arrived, and a few days since our parents were killed in front of us.

The smell of iron still filled my nostrils, and the fear of the bad man coming to get us scared the shit out of me.

"He's in jail, he's not getting us. We're safe, Willow. For once." Matt would say to me, and I tried to remind myself that we were safe.

Opening up the door, I peered around outside to see if anyone was roaming the halls. It was late, and the coast was clear. Almost nightly, if Matt wasn't there to calm me down I'd just walk around by myself or hide in the library, in my spot by the window.

That specific spot brought me some sort of comfort, and that's exactly where I was going. My mind could only take so much more of the panic & paranoia, I so desperately just wanted it to stop.

The entire orphanage was quiet, full of sleeping kids with trauma that they didn't dare speak of. Yet the atmosphere was almost peaceful, but I had yet to find that damn peace.

The world was a fucked up, dark place and that's all I knew the world to be. There was no light in my life, and it left my eyes long ago before I could even comprehend the fucked up life we were given.

My eyes were lifeless, dull & my heart ached. So badly I wanted to be loved, to feel the loving embrace of someone who cared about me, but aside from Matt I had nobody. Matt needed love too, and with both of us being so traumatized we could only do so much for each other.

Love was a fucking illusion, it simply just didn't exist. I could've made up scenarios in my mind all day, creating the perfect life where I was loved, but at the end of the day I was fucking alone.

Crying silently and shaking, I wrapped my arms around myself as I walked into the library where it was quiet and dark.

Nobody could see me in the dark, it was so easy to hide my small, malnourished body in the shadows. The moonlight was shining through the windows, right where my spot was.

Sitting up on the cushion, the waterworks continued until I was quietly hyperventilating. I had my knees to my chest, hugging myself close as a way to comfort myself.

As I sniffled, a lamp flickered on and I glanced in the general direction. Staring at me from a small distance was a lanky black haired boy, with a bad posture and a white t shirt. He waved his pale hand, and I tried to cover my sobs by hiding my face in my arm.