Since he was little, he has always seen weird things. He always thought he had gone completely crazy. No wonder. He thought it was a hallucination something he came up with. Because no one else could see the things. He also doesn't have friends so h...
I'd had enough of living enough of everything. Everything always had to be bad. I am the crazy freak who has crazy hallucinations and went mad. What would people think if they knew I was completely crazy? My mom doesn't get enough money to afford a therapist anyway.
She has to have enough money for me and herself on one salary. Barely make ends meet. And I feel like I'm not doing anything. And these damn hallucinations look at me like they would judge me for being that useless. You wonder which hallucinations?
I see a few ghostly beings, some old, some young. They are always near me. But almost none of them look completely normal and most of them are younger rather than older. They're either bloody or have empty eye sockets instead of eyes or other such bizarre stuff. They look abstruse, not exactly what a small child wants to see.
I couldn't watch a movie where there was blood and my hallucinations look like they've woken up from death, always flying after me and staring at me? I used to play with them for hours hide and seek. But they alway would find me.
Sometimes they were helpful. For example, when a car was driving through the neighborhood and I didn't see it and wanted to go into the street, I was grabbed by my backpack and pulled back a few steps at the last second because the car raced in front of me and almost ran me over.
I still don't know if I'm positive about it though. If it had just been the car, and people could see it as a simple accident in which I died, my mom would certainly be much more positive about it than if I took my own life now.
I can't do it with this ghosts anymore. I'm no longer so sure whether these are just hallucinations. But what else are they supposed to be? I'm just tired of walking around and seeing a bloody corpse staring back at me. I've seen enough blood in my whole life. It drives me crazy being a person that is feeling sane thinking normal and then having to admit to myself that I am not sane
Just like Kacchan told me, I'm a freak. And to have a quirk I should just jump. In another life.
I'm on the edge right now. On the edge of what, you might ask. And the answer is simply on the edge of my school rooftop. Not that anyone but my mom will miss me. I climb over the edge of the fence. I could have chosen a death with less pain but I don't want my mom to know exactly that it was suicide but I want Kacchan to know.
A few hours have passed since school let out. For a few hours I laid in a little pool of blood that formed from my bleeding wounds and looked up at the sky. Before I was ready to end it. I am now on the side without a floor. I sit on the fence for a few seconds and let my feet dangle down. Okay, I think I'm ready now.
Me: I'm sorry I tried. I've actually gotten quite old for a quirkless person. I guess I was just born in the wrong era. There used to be a lot more people who were quirkless. but now even a blue dog is not as noticeable as a quirkless person. I can see, I can hear, I can walk. I am a completely healthy person except for the hallucinations of course and still I can't live my life. What is life for if not to live. Is the only purpose to die?
I close my eyes and jump off the fence. I really expected the fall to be somehow more beautiful. Somehow more meaningful and graceful. Don't people somehow see their lives in the last minutes before they die? I don't see anything. Just bugs flying in my face. Will I survive it. Is that why my fall is not so graceful. It's just as beautiful as an egg that you drop to the ground.
Yes, that's probably how it will look when I land, broken and splattered like an egg.
I really wished for something else, but not even my last wish could be fulfilled. Who knows why? My back is down and I'm looking up at the sky as I fall.
Oh no no no no no no. Don't you dare. Not in my last minutes. There's one of those damned ghosts. She rushes after me with her arms wide open. I just hope I fall first. But it doesn't look like it. Oh no.
Me: Don't you dare save me. Bad halucination. Stay away from me! Just stay in my mind and don't do anything in the reality. It is my life
Hallucination: Ahhhhhhhhhh
What was that? A banshee scream. Actually quite fitting because this is what the hallucination looks like
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