His conscience

"Babe, my broken pieces, you pick them up
Don't leave me hangin', hangin', come give me some
When I'm without you, I'm so insecure
You are the one thing, one thing I'm livin' for."
....

"You could've just said excuse me."

"You say it like you're the nicest person in the world," I murmur.

"At least I don't push past people while I'm walking on the road..."

"I'm sorry," I say after noticing the hard edge to her voice.

"I know you're not in the best mood, but others might not be either. Try to consider that."

"I'm sorry," I repeat, running my hands through my hair. "And you're right. I didn't mean to do that though...I'm not usually like that."

"What's up?"

"Coffee."

"Coffee? What about it?"

We pause the conversation as we cross the slightly busy road quickly. I reach out to hold her hand as we cross and smile to myself when she doesn't take her hand away.

When we arrive at the other side we quickly walk to the abandoned building we climbed the day before. This time we agree not to spend too much time as she knows I don't like being up there.

Speaking of the topic of my sister, I never elaborate whenever I mention something about it. I just stall and stall until I find a way to change the subject and then she forgets about it. At least I hope she does.

"Okay so what about coffee?" she asks as we climb the perron staircase, quicker this time.

"I thought we agreed to not speak while we're on this thing?"

"No we agreed for me not to make jokes so your scared ass won't fall off."

"Same thing...let's wait till we go up."

"whatever, scaredy cat."

***

"So what about coffee?" she asks. We've been sitting in silence close to the edge of the building for a while now. I've been lost in my thoughts.

I let out a loud groan to make it seem like I'm annoyed by her incessant questions but deep down I do love them. I like the sound of her voice.

"It's making my situation worse so I was advised to stop consuming it for some time..."

I pause expecting her to laugh but she's silent.

"How?"

"How it's making my situation worse? Well, insomnia, headaches, anxiety, etc. They've been so much worse these days so I have to stop before it kills me."

"That sucks."

"To put it simply."

"How are you coping? You seem really attached to it."

"Experiencing withdrawal as expected."

She finally laughs after a while. Why do I like the sound of her laughter so bad?

"Are you for real?"

"Yeah...it's bad. I didn't think I could go but I'm trying. Some days I think of just giving up but then I think of my health...and then I just take it out of my mind." I shake my head with a sigh. I'm grateful she's the one I'm telling this to because I can't even try to hide my exhaustion and I usually have to.

"Did they give you a timeline?"

"End of the month."

"Tough."