Realmshift: code of the fallen

Kai should have known something was wrong when his spoon started humming in harmony with itself.

It wasn't the usual judgmental vibration of the Spoon of Unrelenting Destiny. This was a warm, soft hum. Curious. Almost... pleased?

He stood on a patch of stable terrain at the base of the next tower level, still catching his breath after the Patch Guardian fiasco. The others, Crumble, Greg, Lyn, were sorting loot, eating poorly-rendered sandwiches, and arguing over whether Greg had actually saved the day or simply flailed at the right place at the right time (Greg honked in the affirmative, clearly offended).

Kai, meanwhile, was staring at the blinking icon in his interface:

[Fallen Code Level 2: UNLOCK AVAILABLE]
Warning: This may result in permanent narrative instability.
Also possibly a talking HUD. Don't say we didn't warn you.

Unlock Fallen Code Level 2? [Y] / [N]

He hovered over the prompt. It flickered slightly, like it was alive.

Crumble wandered over, munching a biscuit. "Hey, what's up?"

"It wants me to level up my Fallen Code."

"Ooooh. Press it."

"You say that every time."

"And every time, chaos."

Kai hesitated... then tapped [Y].

The interface paused.

Reality stuttered.

Then—

[FALLEN CODE: LEVEL 2 ACTIVATED]
You are no longer the sole narrator of your journey.
Welcome to Co-Processing Mode.
Good luck.

The world snapped back into place.

And then a new voice appeared.

In his head.

"Oh. It's you."

Kai flinched. "What?"

"I was hoping for a better host. Someone taller. With at least three brain cells."

He looked around. "Who, what is this?"

"I'm your code. The part of you that shouldn't exist. The part they buried. You just gave me a voice. Congratulations, Player: You have unlocked me."

The spoon buzzed. Kai swore it was laughing.

"Is this a glitch spirit thing?"

"Please. Don't reduce me to genre tropes. I'm a sentient subsystem designed to destabilise conformity and inject possibility into stale loops. Also I like shiny things."

Crumble tilted his head. "You're talking to yourself again, aren't you."

Kai pointed at his skull. "Fallen Code 2.0 just came with... commentary."

Crumble blinked. "You mean like... a narrator?"

"Narrator? Ugh. More like editor, conscience, chaos co-pilot, depends on the mood."

Greg honked, unimpressed.

Lyn glanced up. "You unlocked second-tier glitch powers and now you're haunted by your own patch notes?"

"Rude." the voice said. "Also accurate."

Kai scrolled through his updated abilities. They now came with flavour text that argued with him.

[NEW PASSIVE: Unlikely Outcome Generator]
Randomly converts low-probability events into high-impact moments.
Note: May cause spontaneous musical numbers.
— "You're welcome."

[ACTIVE: Paradox Pulse]
Triggers a contradiction in local logic. Deals variable damage.
— "Use wisely. Or don't. Whatever."

[FALLEN COMPANION: Me]
You're stuck with me now. We're best friends. I promise.
(I lie sometimes.)

"Okay," Kai muttered. "So I've gone from dangerous to dangerously chatty."

"Better than dangerously boring."

He glared at the air. "Can you not backtalk me while I'm trying to think?"

"No promises. But hey, I brought snacks."

He looked down.

There was now a glitch-donut in his hand. It sparkled with particles that looked like broken UI buttons.

Crumble sniffed it. "That's either food or philosophy."

Kai bit it.

Definitely food.

They reached the next biome: The Paradox Plateau.

It was... wrong.

The sky was underground. Water flowed upward. Trees whispered in JavaScript. NPCs walked in loops that made no sense, one cried about their long-lost brother while their dialogue box claimed to be a cactus.

Even the enemy mobs were confused. A group of wolves asked politely if Kai had seen their therapist. A slime cube chased its own shadow.

[SYSTEM ZONE: PARADOX PLATEAU – WHERE NO RULE MAKES SENSE TWICE]
Logic has left the server.

"I love it here," Fallen Code purred in Kai's head. "Let's build a summer home. Maybe corrupt a few fundamentals."

"Can you be quiet for one second?" Kai snapped.

"I could. But then who would warn you about—"

A boulder exploded.

Kai dove as a massive enemy landed where he'd just been.

[ENEMY: PATCHED MINOTAUR – A DEV'S REGRET MADE MANIFEST]
Once a dungeon boss. Now a misunderstood metaphor with hooves.

It roared in broken logic:

"IF 1 = COW, THEN YOU = MILK!"

Kai rolled to his feet. "Great! Nonsensical violence!"

He activated Paradox Pulse.

The minotaur froze, blinked, then turned into two smaller minotaurs who began arguing about whose existence was more valid.

"That'll buy you ten seconds," Fallen Code said smugly. "You're welcome."

"Can you give me useful advice?"

"Sure. Don't sneeze near that geyser."

"Why?"

"Because—"

Kai sneezed.

The geyser turned into a rain of pies.

Hot pies.

Exploding pies.

The minotaurs exploded.

[Achievement Unlocked: Chaos Bakes Best]

Later, while setting up camp under a tree that gave passive-aggressive compliments, Kai sat staring at the Truth.txt file he'd gotten from the Patch Guardian.

He still hadn't opened it.

"You're afraid," Fallen Code said.

"No. I'm cautious."

"You're afraid it'll tell you you're not real. Or worse, that you're just a footnote."

Kai stayed silent.

Crumble and Lyn were asleep. Greg was standing sentinel, eyeing a rock with lethal suspicion.