TRIAL AND ERROR | short stories + snippets

Daisy has her blanket pulled over her head as she cries. Sachiko and Behati both sit on the side of her bed and try to coax her out of hiding while Caleb awkwardly sits on her spinny desk chair. He's not entirely sure why he has to be in the room but he was told to come help comfort his sister so here he is.

'I'm going to be stuck at Daiki's Corner Shop for the rest of my life. How am I so stupid?'

'You're not stupid, baby.' Behati rubs Daisy's back. 'And you won't be stuck anywhere you don't want to.'

Sachiko hums in agreement until Behati elbows her and she jolts. 'You can always apply somewhere else with Clearing¹.'

'Yes,' Behati says in a tone that makes it clear she's prodding Sachiko more than Daisy, 'or you can resit and reapply next year if you're set on Edinburgh.'

Sachiko hums again though it's shrill this time. 'Of course. But Edinburgh is quite expensive so you could consider somewhere closer and cheaper. What's wrong with Manchester? Then you can live at home.'

Irritation radiates from Behati. She speaks through a smile. 'But, my love, Edinburgh has been her dream for years. We could support our daughter–'

'I'm supporting,' Sachiko interrupts, the first to raise her voice. 'Dreams can change.'

Caleb does his best to ignore the brewing argument. Half of Daisy's wardrobe puddles on the floor, the rest on display with the door open. Butterfly prints and pink sequins are colour-blocked with every possible shade of denim. On autopilot, he picks up a viscose skirt and lays it over his lap.

Her desk is covered in makeup since she hasn't needed it to study over the summer. An open eyeshadow palette displays a full rainbow of colours, matte and shimmery. Caleb sweeps his index over the glittery aqua and swabs it on the back of his other hand.

It stains a lot of glitter and very little blue, unsurprising considering these must be the cheapest eyeshadows available in the country. Daisy might've gotten them out of a cereal packet.

'Don't you think so, Caleb?'

He snaps his attention to Behati who watches him expectantly. As subtly as he can, he shoves the skirt off his lap back to the floor under the desk.

Behati prods, 'That your sister will be able to do whatever she wants.'

Caleb has no words of wisdom to provide. He got As on most of his GCSEs and has decided, after all, not to drop out of school. Daisy's one of the cleverest people he knows (not that he'd ever tell her that)—it never crossed his mind that she could not get into uni. She did so well on her mocks that everyone took for granted that she'd get the AAB marks she needed for her offer from Edinburgh.

'Yeah.' Standing up with his crutches, he steps closer to the bed, stands a moment, then takes another step. He speaks to the Twilight posters above Daisy's bed. 'It's fine, Daisy. Loads of people don't get into uni the first time around, especially from our shit school—Sorry,' he tacks on when Behati casts him a look. 'If you take a gap year to work, you won't have to be a total povo at uni.'

'Yes, that is a good point. It might be a nice experience and your academic brain can get some rest.'

'How about we go eat at Kanesaka today, eh?' Sachiko says. 'To celebrate you both passing your exams.'

This idea immediately rouses Daisy to sit up, her curls poking in every direction. But as delicious as their okonomiyaki are, Caleb grimaces. He hadn't imagined his evening including going out and as much as he wants the food, a weight sets in his chest. He hasn't mentally prepared. He's already been to the doctors and the school today—it's enough socialising.

'Can Nikki come?'

Sachiko laughs, mirth bubbling from her belly. 'I assumed he would.' She messes his hair as she passes. 'I'm surprised you two manage to be apart long enough to shower separately.'

Behati kisses Daisy's head before leaving the room. Caleb swings on his crutches, glancing at his sister's tear-stained face before glueing his eyes to Edward's weird sparkly skin.

'It'll be okay,' he says.

Daisy shrugs. 'Thanks.'

She climbs out of bed and heads for the toilet, leaving Caleb alone in the room. His focus threads to the skirt on the floor, its shimmery lavender glowing under the desk. What if he steals it? Daisy wouldn't notice.

He doesn't manage a step before the voice of reason in his head reminds him that he's a boy. His attraction to the skirt is just some unlearned desire to be cis. He hated wearing skirts back in primary when that was still his uniform, cried so much at it that Nicolás would swap to let Caleb wear his trousers even if it got him in trouble. He's just being weird.

Caleb rushes out of the room as quickly as he can with crutches before hooking them under his arm to hop down the stairs. He doesn't make it more than halfway before he stops.

'We can't afford restaurant food right now,' Behati's voice bites. She's whispering but the gust cleaves through the house.

'I think we can afford one dinner with our kids,' Sachiko responds, eye roll audible. 'Besides, May always gives us a discount. It's fine.'

Behati's frustration only serrates further. 'Why is it so impossible for you to discuss things with me first?' Sachiko's laugh crams between Behati's words and the latter raises her voice over it. 'You can't go promising them all these things!'

'Like how you've promised Daisy that we can afford to support her rent and tuition in bloody Edinburgh? Because we most certainly can't. Especially not for a degree that won't even make her money down the line.'

'We'll figure it out.'

'So we can't figure out one restaurant meal?'

'That's not the same–!'

Caleb drops his crutches. They tumble down the stairs with enough ruckus for his mothers to fall quiet.

Notes

1. Clearing: Where universities advertise places that are still open after the first round of acceptances. If you don't get in to your first choice or your insurance choice, you can apply for another spot at a different university or different programme through Clearing.