Finding Myself Again (Adopted by Markiplier)

^Karli

~I am exhausted by trying to be stronger than I feel. 

By the time we got to Mark's house, it was around noon. His house was gorgeous, everything was modern, beautifully decorated, and he had five mother fucking ovens. Interior design is a guilty pleasure of mine, I grew up watching HGTV, so everything is integrated into my brain. 

After being attacked by a golden fluff ball of fluff, whom I learned was Chica, Mark led me to my room. The walls were white, with black trimming. Right smack dab in the middle, was a giant king bed with white sheets, a grey throw pillow, and six pillows. The bed was held up by a grey fabric frame. Above the bed, was a line painting drawn directly onto the wall of a horse leaping into flowers. Why a horse? 

On each side of the bed, there was a shiny black nightstand with a gold lamp. To the right of the bed was a grey futon couch looking thing. The outer curtains were black, and in the middle sat a sheer panel. Adjacent to that sat a black dresser with gold fixtures and a TV sat on top of it. 

"Holy shit." I let a breath out loudly as I walked around the room. There were two doors from the left of the bed, one was a walk-in closet, and the other is a pretty decently sized bathroom that had stainless steel fixtures and a huge walk-in shower. 

Mark chuckled at my amazement. "Yeah, this was the guest bedroom, but for now it's yours." I still can't figure out why Mark is doing all of this for me. Tears welled up in my eyes once again. I really need to start controlling my emotions better. "Hey, what's wrong?" His voice softened, and he looked at me with eyes that had so much in them. Pain, sorrow, empathy. Mark rested a hand on my shoulder. 

"Why are you doing this for me, Mark?" I slowly slid down the wall, I hate feeling pitied but I can't help this. 

"Because I know exactly how you feel right now. I know your helplessness, feeling like it's your fault, being numb, angry and sad all in the same day. I felt all of that when my dad died, and I'll be damned if I let you go through this alone. Plus, the foster and adoption care in LA is practically useless and borderline abusive. I would hate myself if I didn't help you." I looked down at my hands, speechless. The only people who have cared about me like that were my parents and Maddie. 

One question burned in my mind though, would this be a permanent thing? "Mark, I can't even begin to express my gratitude, but my parents have a very small chance of survival." I went quiet after that, and Mark seemed to know what I was getting at. 

"If this turns into a permanent thing, then let's let it happen. I care for you a lot more than you think I do, Karli." Hearing those two sentences comforted me more than anything. I drew in a shaky breath as I spoke. "Thank you," Mark's eyes gleamed with care and trust. 

"Of course. I'll leave you to unpack, I'll be recording but don't be afraid to come and get me if you need anything, but text me before you come in, some things are hard to edit out." He squeezed my hand before getting up and softly shutting the door behind him. I laughed as he left. 

I started unpacking the little that I brought in my suitcase. Who knows how long I'll be staying here, so I'll probably end up going back home at some point. I diligently put my clothes away into the shiny, black dresser and hung everything that needed to be hung up. A brown picture frame was the last out of my suitcase. I was with my parents, my late dog and I sitting in a park. I brushed my tears away from my face as I set the fragile frame onto the left nightstand. 

A loud 'fuck' erupted from down the hall. Laughing, I decided to sneak into the kitchen and grab something to eat. I tiptoed down the stairs, careful not to disturb a sleeping Chica and to not be heard on camera. I grabbed an apple from Mark's fridge, a cutting board, a knife, and cinnamon from his spice cabinet. After silently cutting the apple into tiny, bite-size pieces, I sprinkled cinnamon on them and transferred them into a bowl. I rinsed off my dishes and placed them into the dishwasher. I went back upstairs to watch some Netflix for a few hours.