A Random Lockdown Diary

DREAMS
I had two dreams last night (though one was hard to categorize.)  They were both very detailed.
In the first dream/nightmare/idk, two of my friends had a baby.  I was really happy for them, but upset with myself.  BF had died somehow, and I believed it was my fault.  Consequently, I'd also lost a future like my friends'.  One of them realized what was going on and gave me a big hug.  That helped for a moment.  However, their new baby was much more important, and I didn't want to burden them, so I decided to leave until I could make myself feel better.
There wasn't much to do.  I went down to my basement to organize the storage room, but when I opened it, everything was already done.  Out of frustration, I grabbed a bunch of root beer and drank it.  It just made me feel worse.  Even though I literally don't know how to drive, I got in the car and started heading out of town.
Eventually, I got to a bridge.  As I was driving over it, someone stopped me.  It was my friend's dad.  He wasn't afraid or angry or anything.  Actually, he was really nice and even cheerful.  He helped me get out and walk towards home.  On the way back down the bridge, I saw the beach, with golden white sand and clear turquoise water with green patches underneath.  It looked like the Bahamas.  I started to feel at peace.
My friend's dad let me go at an intersection.  I thought I was okay, but I started crying again.  Some other "friends" were there (people idk irl,) so I joined them and we went shopping at a gas station.  There was a sandwich shop underneath.  One of the girls was hungry, but broke, so she ordered some food and I offered to pay.  However, the cashier wasn't okay with that.  He said she had to pay for her own meal and that I wasn't allowed to help her.  The dream/nightmare/idk ended as we argued over it.
In the second dream, I was playing in a neighborhood sandbox.  Idk why.  It was relaxing, though.  Then there was some sort of transition.  I can't remember what it was, though.  Maybe I'd zoned out, or someone was telling me a story, or maybe I'd physically gone somewhere, idk.
Anyway, I was at a palace, viewing everything from third person.  King and Queen Macbeth (what an original name) had just secured the kingdom against some invaders.  They also had a baby son.  The whole kingdom was celebrating, and the king and queen were doing everything in their power to make things perfect.
Fast forward a few years, and there was another attack.  My perspective was jumping between characters, as well as occasionally staying in third person.  The prince was looking at a family tiara when a group of pirates took him captive.  Their goal had only been to get the tiara, but they didn't want witnesses.  The king organized a search party for the rest of the kingdom, while the queen searched the palace by herself.  Eventually, they found their son as the pirates took him onto their ship.  The tiara was in a locked compartment on the ship, and the only way to unlock it was if everyone stood in a certain spot on the deck to form its shape.  The queen freed the prince and tricked everyone into standing in formation.  However, it was storming, and as the lock opened, the ship hit a huge wave and capsized.  Everyone reached for the tiara as they fell.  My perspective switched to the prince's as the waves came over me.  Realizing I was drowning, I forced myself awake.  Turns out, nothing was covering my face or anything, I was just holding my breath LOL.  It was a very interesting story, though.  Big Princess Bride energy.
For the first… thing, I have a few explanations.  One of my friends did actually have a baby recently.  I'm so happy for her!  The baby is so cute too!  BF isn't dead, obviously, but since we still have to wait a few years to have kids, I wonder if I subconsciously feel like it won't happen at all.  In that case, I just need to relax and be patient.  As for the root beer, one of the last things I remember before falling asleep was wanting some.  Also, the beach scene was because I've been on Google Earth a lot LOL.
For the second dream, I don't have many explanations.  Macbeth is one of my favorite Shakespeare plays, so that's definitely part of it, but other than that, I think my brain was just making up a fun story!

WRITING
Anyway, I spent a good amount of time writing all that after I woke up.

ARGUMENT
Then I had a huge argument with my mom while I was trying to eat breakfast.  BF came and picked me up shortly after.

BF
Took me a long time to calm down, but BF was very patient and loving.  He listened and made sure I was comfortable.  We lay on blankets and chilled out on our phones for a while.  He fell asleep for a few minutes.  That was cute.  We spent the rest of the day relaxing, watching YouTube, and talking about things.  We also had a bit of together-alone time, if that makes sense.  He played a video game and I watched Miraculous.  I'm glad we can just relax together.

YOU
How are you today?