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TW: (weirdly misguided) HOMOPHOBIA, TRANSPHOBIA, GUNS, DEATH, ‼️‼️SWEARING‼️‼️
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Aria: Those bastards, who do they think they are?!
Dustin: *shrugs*
Aria: THEY KNOW WE'RE TOO POWERFUL FOR THEM-
Pamela: Maybe we should listen to them, they might be right...
Aria: NO THEY'RE NOT
Pamela: ...
Aria: THOSE BITCHES WANT TO INVADE OUR SCHOOL, WE NEED TO FIGHT BACK
Pamela: I- I'm sorry.
Aria: Just, come with me.
Ew why do I have to narrate for these idiots?
Ugh fine I'll do it.
Aria takes Pamela to a platform on a tree, and the two of them sat watching the sunset.
Aria: Look, Pam.
Pamela: Huh?
Aria: Everything the light touches is our kingdom. Queen's time as a ruler rises and falls like the sun.
Dustin: *finally manages to climb the platform* *looks at them like they're crazy*
Aria: One day, the sun will set on my time here, and will rise with you, as the new queen.
Pamela: Did you just quote the lion king?
Aria: But it's true.
Pamela: You're not gonna die
Aria: If I don't, my parents are gonna make me switch schools. They said I would have to if anything else crazy happened in school.
Pamela: Oh.
Aria: Whatever happens to me, when I'm gone, you need to take charge, and show those gay bastards who's boss.
Pamela: *nods* I will.
Dustin: Will I be second in command when you're gone?
Aria: Shut up Dustin, go and watch your idiotic anime.
Dustin: Sorry.
Pamela: I promise, I will take back our land and show them how wrong they are.
Aria: *smiles* Thank god
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Tater: *possibly panicking* Ok, ok, so, so, so, I started a war with people who've spent the past five years training for a war, who have fucking stone swords, and a base, and other weapons that an army could use. This is fine.
Jojo: Nothing bad is going to happen.
Tater: Really? Cause normally all my ideas end badly.
Jojo: Well, at least this one is fighting for what's right.
Tater: *smiles* Thanks-
Crutchie: *runs into the room* *where'd your limp go huh* GUYS THEY'RE OUTSIDE THEY'RE OUTSIDE
Tater: WAIT WHAT
Mike: *runs by and screams when an arrow nearly hits him*
Crutchie: *screams again*
Tater: *is SMART and takes a sword and shield with them because they clearly play too much minecraft instead of writing* What do you want-
Aria: *standing on a somewhat tall tree trunk* Tater, and Applez, and the rest of you gay bastards.
Elmer: :(
Aria: We... are at war. There is no mercy. We have burnt all of Hermione's things, we have planted poison ivy cannons around your land, we have shot one warning shot inside your walls. WE HAVE NO MERCY! NO MERCY FOR YOU!
WE WILL BURN DOWN YOUR HOUSES, WE WILL KILL EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU, AND WE WILL TAKE BACK THE LAND THAT IS RIGHTFULLY OURS AND STOP IT FROM BEING INFECTED WITH YOUR WEIRD GROSS- WHATEVER! IF YOU DO NOT SURRENDER- I WANNA SEE WHITE FLAGS! WHITE FLAGS OUTSIDE YOUR BASE BY TOMORROW AT DAWN OR YOU ARE DEAD!
The robins (stupid name) slowly walked away, most of them glaring at the newsies.
Tater: Well that was.... Eventful
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Tater: *walks back into the base after like just staring for fifteen minutes because smarts* Alright guys, how's everything?
Specs: Well they've surrounded us.
Romeo: Yeah they're hiding in the trees!
Specs: They keep targeting Mike and Ike, and Ike's already been shot in the shoulder.
Tater: *facepalms* Seriously? He's already injured and we haven't even started to fight?
Specs: Yeah, we've got Al and Race working on a roof right now.
Tater: Oh shit-
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Race: dodododododododo building a roof yeah we're building a roof we're working so hard cause we're building a roof-
Albert: WILL YOU PLEASE SHUT UP?!
Race: *uses his shield to block an arrow that someone tried to shoot at him* No I can't cause we're building a roof, we're spending all our time building a roof, not even caring cause we're building a roof-
Albert: THAT'S IT I GIVE UP
Race: Building a roof?
Albert: *yeets his shield at the ground* THIS WAS A STUPID IDEA ANYWAYS, BESIDES-
Race: AL NO-
One of the Robins shoots Albert through the heart with an arrow cause most of us aren't old enough to buy guns yet, and he falls off the roof, dying the second he hits the ground.
Race: *shoots back at the Robin* WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT WHY DID YOU KILL SOMEONE YOU AMBASTARD
Lauren: *shouts from the trees* WHAT THE FUCK IS AN AMBASTARD
Race: I DUNNO
Lauren: *tries to shoot him, but unlike Albert, he's smart and blocks it with his shield*
Race:*jumps off the roof and goes back inside under the small part of the base that has a roof*
Elmer: Where's Al?
Race: Oh... umm... he went to go get coronas?
Elmer: *is not that dumb* ohnononononononnonnononononono *runs outside and somehow doesn't get shot*
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We have had to skip a few minutes because the curse words yelled at Elmer were too many for any brain to handle.
Especially when he hugged Albert
Oh, they're all back inside.
We can go back-
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Elmer: *just sitting on the ground staring at the sand*
Tater: I never thought they would actually kill someone.
Cass: I just thought they would like throw stuff at us, but not kill anyone.
Tater: Yeah.
Sniper: *sits down next to Elmer* Hey El.
Elmer: *doesn't respond*
Sniper: So, how are you today?
Elmer: *still doesn't respond*
Sniper: That's... nice
Smalls: Snipe, just leave him alone.
Sniper: *gets up* Fine.
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Tater: *talking to the nice people and the wattpad people HAIIIII YOU GUYS ARE THE BEST* So, they know how to fight. And they're kind of smart. But we need to get ahead of them so nothing else bad happens.
Cass: This seems kinda dangerous...
Micah: What if we just go out and use our shields?
Anna: Albert died and he had a shield on him.
Hope: Anna's right. We have to think of something else so we don't get killed.
Tater: A sneak attack. The element of surprise is what we need. We cant just go in guns blazing-
Hermione: We're not using guns.
Tater: Sorry, bows and arrows blazing- It doesn't sound the same! But yeah, a sneak attack.
Kiera: A sneak attack is like the most obvious thing someone would do right now. And there's a bunch of them in the trees, they'll know before we get there.
Tater: That's why we mislead them.
Anna: How the fuck are we gonna do that?
Davey: LANG-
Micah: Davey shut the fuck up
Tater: We tell them we want to fight on the field, and once they're there, some of us go and attack their base.
Newt: Won't they realize there's some of us missing?
Tater: *shrugs* Probably, but their base is far from the field, and we can slow them down.
Anna: What are you gonna get from their base anyways?
Tater: We can get some weapons and supplies, and destroy a lot of their stuff so we have an advantage.
Shay: So... who are we sending?
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Aria: *checks her phone and sees a text from Tater* She (fuck you) can't even come and tell me herself?
Pamela: What does it say?
Aria: "Lol u homophobic bastard come fite me in the field in 30 mins or I go and stab stab you coward"
Pamela: ... Did they-
Aria: *glares*
Pamela: Did Tater never learn how to form sentences?
Aria: I dunno, but those dumbasses don't know what's gonna hit them.
Dustin: Should I get everyone ready?
Aria: Yeah, but first, I have an idea
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Pam (I gave up typing the whole name): *whispering* What are we doing outside their base?
Dustin: *about to knock on the door we apparently have?* *dumbass*
Aria: Dustin, get away from the door. *takes out a bomb wtf where'd you get that*
Pam: We're not gonna blow them up, right?
Aria: Nah, just one of the walls so we can get in later on.
Pam: They're going to notice, they're in their base.
Aria: Well, lets hope they're smart enough to stay away from walls.
Pam: *stares as Aria sets off the bomb somehow idk how this shit works*
Aria: *running away from the bomb* Getoutgetoutgetoutgetout!
Aria, Dustin, and Pam: *cheer and jump around happily as one of the walls of the base blow up*
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Tater: *checking around the blown up wall* Is everyone okay?
Specs: No one died.
Tater: That sounds like someone got hurt.
Specs: Yeah, Blink hurt his arm.
Tater: Damnit.
Cass: On the bright side, some people already went to their base to attack-
Tater: BUT THEY'RE NOT OUT OF THE BASE YET
Shay: Oh shit-
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Josh: *trying to walk through the forest quietly* Why did I have to come?
Micah: Because Tater spun a wheel- I mean, because we're the best choices for this.
Kath: Really?
Sniper: Yeah- Smalls, please let go
Smalls: *wont stop hugging Sniper* But-
Micah: Shut up, we're here.
The small group of newsies look around, trying to spot the enemy.
Kath: Where are they?
Robin: Right behind you.
Ariana: And we would prefer if you used our correct pronouns, there are no they/them freaks in our school
Sniper: HOW FUCKING DARE YOU-
The newsies watch helplessly as Eli- I mean Sniper ran towards the few kids in front of him, trying to hit them with a sword.
Robin: *smiles but like creepy* Oh you pathetic little kid. *takes out A FUCKING GUN WHERE THE FUCK DID HE GET THAT*
The newsies watch in horror as he pulls the trigger and...
Smalls jumps in front of Sniper to save him.
Micah pulls Sniper into the bushes as Josh and Kath are shot fatally.
What the fuck is wrong is wrong with these kids?
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Back at the base...
Tyler: What if she's hurt? What if she died? What if she-
Tater: I'm sure Micah's fine.
Tyler: If she was fine, she would have been back by now!
Tater: Fine, I'll get a few people to find her.
Tyler: I'll go too.
Tater: No, cause if she is dead, and you die too, Sushi'll be an orphan.
Tyler: Hope and Grace can take care of her until you revive us.
Tater: Ugh fine but Micah's gonna blame me if you die. Skye, Ben, go with him. If any of you die, I'm suing your dead bodies for money to buy a better knife and stop Micah from complaining about your death.
Skye: What the-
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Yep it's gonna have another part.
Sorry.
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