With All My Spark → Transformers

*I don't own Transformers or anything affiliated with Transformers. I only own my original characters and plots. All rights go to Michael Bay and Steven Spielberg.*

The rain pattered down onto my bedroom window. I sighed, and sat up. Normally, I loved rain, but given the circumstances, I absolutely despised it. I looked around and noticed that Ironhide wasn't beside me anymore; he was most likely at base or sitting downstairs with everyone else.

I pushed myself off of my bed and walked over to my dresser to pick out something to wear for the day. After rummaging through my clothes for a few minutes, I finally picked out a pair of white Hollister shorts, a white tank top, and my plain black Nike hoodie. I changed quickly and threw my hair into a messy bun before heading downstairs.

To my surprise, the only people I saw were my dad, who sat on the couch flipping through the TV channels, and Adalyn who was in the kitchen conjuring up some sort of food.

"Where is everyone?" I asked as I sat down beside my dad.

"Cleaning up my house," he grumbled as he very aggressively pressed the buttons on the remote.

I gently removed the device from his hand and laid it down on the table before turning back to him. He had tears in his eyes and it absolutely pained me to see him like this. Never in my life had I seen my dad so vulnerable. He wasn't even this bad after the base attack in Washington back in 2009. It almost made me want to cry.

"Daddy," I whispered as I took his hand in mine.

He squeezed it before pulling me to him. I hugged my dad tightly as he cried, but I didn't even know what to say to him. I'd never dealt with him like this before.

"You're all I have left of them, Azalea. I don't know what I would do if I lost you too," he sniffed.

I smiled sadly and released him, wiping the tears out of his eyes.

"I'm not going anywhere, dad. I promise you that. Remember what you told me that one day almost two years ago? You said 'You're Azalea Lennox. You're tough'. You have to take your own advice now dad. It's hard. It really is. I don't even know if I'm going to be able to handle it, but seeing you like this just makes it worse for me, so please be tough. For me?"

He smiled and wiped away the rest of his tears before squeezing my hand again. "I can only try, but since I love you so much I guess I could try just a tad bit harder," he responded.

I smiled back and propped my legs up onto the coffee table, last night's thoughts immediately coming to mind, causing my smile to drop.

"Can I talk to you about something?" I asked him.

"Sure. Go for it, kid."

I took a deep breath.

"Well, last night I was doing some serious thinking. I was thinking about how as soon as I met Ron, everything in my life changed for both the better and for the worst. I was wondering about how different my life would've been if he had never brought you home or if you have been in some different branch of the military or even if you hadn't been in the military at all.

"It didn't take me long at all to realize just how fantastic my life could have been. Braelynn would still be alive and we could have went to college together like we planned. I would've come back home to Washington state after college and found a nice job and I would've ended up with a normal human boy. Mom and Annabelle would be here annoying the piss out of me, but I wouldn't care because everything would just be perfect," I started, the tears already rolling down my face.

My dad gave me a strange look. "What are you saying, Lea?"

"I love Ironhide so much. I love all of the Autobots. I really do and I always will, but I just need a break from all of this, dad. I can't do this anymore. For the past four years my life has been ruled by Cybertronian beings. The bad ones may be gone, but still. I can't turn my head without seeing one of them, whether they're in holoform or not," I replied.