I'm Not Leaving

Part 6

"No. I'm exactly where I want to be. " He held her hand in his, playing with her fingers. "I don't smell do I?"

"No, not yet." She replied.

"I know you hate feeling helpless. I hate it, too. I'm not trying to say that I know what you're going through. I just want you to know that you're not alone."

"I didn't think the big, strong, fearless, untouchable mob - umm, coffee importer - ever felt helpless." She said, squeezing his hand.

"Only when he's in love with a beautiful woman who has wanted to be with for such an incredibly long time he couldn't even admit it to himself, and now he's scared it could all slip through his fingers."

He took a deep breath.

"Sonny," she said, lifting up to place a firm kiss on his lips with all the strength she could muster.

He put a finger to her mouth to silence her.

"You push, Alexis. You push when you're afraid. You push when you think it's too much. You push when you think someone might not stay. I know. I know you'll push when you think I can't take it. When you think it'll hurt too much to walk with you through this. So, you push when you need to ... I'm not leaving. I'm not. I can take a little pushing until you're able to trust that. Just please - I mean please remember that you don't have to be afraid."

He returned the kiss as if sealing a promise.

She leaned her forehead against his, taking several breaths before speaking.

"Kristina was here." She said, his eyebrow raising in response.

"Kristina was here." He nodded.

"So, let's talk."

***

"You heard her."

She nodded.

"With all the medicine and lack of sleep, I thought it was a dream."

"No, it wasn't a dream."

"You think I'm a coward?"

"Did I say that?" She sat across from him at the dining room table picking at a piece of toast. "You are drowsy, dehydrated, and - and very sick. You did the right thing."

"What did you tell her? How - how did she get here? Where was Sam - Jason?"

"You give me what I want, and I'll give you what you want."

She scrunched up her face. "I want to be in bed with you ..." She began, pinching off a bite of toast and putting it in her mouth. "Without clothes, with popcorn ..."

Sonny licked his lips and smiled showing her the full force of his dimples. There is nothing he wanted more, but he needed to talk to her about their daughter.

"You've gotten bolder with expressing your feelings, Counsellor. Riskier with your deflection." He told her with a grin, remembering when talking about her feelings for him caused her face to redden or the need to breathe into a bag.

"Life's short." She mumbled as she finished the piece of toast. "Happy?"

He nodded.

"Kristina, has been picking up on something being, uh, not quite right."
"In what way?"

"Well, before she left on the trip she said felt silly, but she just wanted to hug you in person. That she'd missed you. You were asleep when she woke up for school and you'd been getting home late at night. I comforted the best I could. Sam and I convinced her to Facetime you before they left to go camping. We missed the call."