With you ~ ?????? ????????? ? ???! ??

37. Sir Ulgerthorpe AKA The Archipelago's Most Annoying Viking

Dust fell down. Tuff started to sniffle. We all tried to silently tell him to hold in his sneeze. Luckily, Fishlegs covered Tuff's mouth.

"We accept your terms." I heard Viggo. "Offload Trader Johann's dragons and place them with the others."

"My poor heart will surely not withstand any more of these harrowing moments." I heard Johann. Is he talking to himself?

Snotlout's POV:

"Where is this simpleton?" I said, still putting on my fake accent. "Does he make it a practice of disrespecting his best clients like this?"

"You do realize you actually aren't a best client." Gobber said.

"I'm in character, Gobber, so, no. No, I do not realize that." I frowned.

We then heard rustling from the bushes. A (what looked to be) Boulder Class dragon emerged and started snacking on some scrap metal.

"Look at that big guy." Gobber said in awe.

"Ugliest dragon I've ever seen." I replied, picking at my nails.

"I think he's magnificent." Gobber walked towards the dragon.

"Of course you do." I muttered.

"Hello." Gobber cooed, feeding the dragon some more scrap metal.

"Out of my way, Grump. Fat beast." Ryker kicked the dragon.

"Do you auction off the ugly, fat one as well?" Gobber asked.

Ryker laughed. "Who would buy him? Besides, he eats all the scrap iron and is the only dragon that can bite through a dragon-proof cage. Personally, I'd just as soon skin him and eat him. That fat would be tasty on toast squared with some yak butter. Eh, Grump?" The way Ryker talked about dragons disgusted me.

"But Viggo likes having him around." Ryker continued. "Says there's a use for everyone."

"When you two ladies are done blabbering about whatever, I'd like to do some business. Is that not what we came for?" I interupted before Gobber could do something to blow our cover.

"What, are you waiting for my permission?" Ryker asked.

"I'm waiting for some 'me' time. A private place to count my money out of the eyesight or earshot of your goons." I explained. "Offense intended. This will do. Come on, valet."

"Nobody goes inside Viggo's tent." Ryker stoppped me.

I chuckled. "Very nice. First of all, Sir Ulgerthorpe goes where Sir Ulgerthorpe wants. Second, I need to count my gold. It's not gonna count itself. And unless you plan on building me a hut in the next five minutes, I'll do it where I want! Of course, I can go elsewhere and you can explain to your brother-"

Ryker cut me off. "Go ahead. Count your coins. But mak it quick."

"Can you believe that barbarian? The nerve to question my intentions." I shook my head, walking into Viggo's tent.

"You can drop the act. We're alone." Gobber said.

"Sir Ulgerthorpe does not kowtow to pressure, nor does he break character. He lives with in. He becomes it." I replied.

"Well, you tell Sir Ulgerthorpe that if he doesn't help Sir Gobber find the manifest, this hool is going to become-"

"All right, fine." I interupted him.

Gobber put the chest down as we started to look. "You know, you could be a better scene partner. It is two-sided. I'm giving them myseld and I would appreciate a return on that energy." I said.