It's you I'm thinking of > Patrick Feely

Ruby

My head throbbed as I leaned against the inside passenger door of Patrick's car. I was suddenly very aware of my surroundings. I let my head roll gently forward until my chin was touching my chest.

"Ruby?" Patrick questioned, taking the hair that shielded my face and tucking it behind my ear.

"Hmm?" I croaked, straightening out my back. My eyes hung low and were damp and I felt as exhaustion took over my body. I could barely concentrate and everything seemed blurry.

"Keep your eyes open, baby. You hit your head." He spoke calmly.

I shivered. "I hit my head?"

Patrick placed his palm against my forehead and gently lifted my head until I was leaning against the headrest. "Yeah, you did." He told me, "Can you remember my name?"

I nodded, "You're Trick."

"Okay, good. Where are we?" He asked again.

I took a moment to look around my blurry surroundings before turning back to him. "Somewhere in Ballylaggin." I felt like I was spinning upside down.

Hmm, but his hand against my cold skin felt good.

"What happened, Trick?" I questioned, hoarsely, after a moment.

I couldn't see Patrick but I heard him quietly grumble something under his breath, "I don't know," He shifted in his seat, "I found you on the floor in the back hall. I haven't seen you all night."

I took slow shallow breaths, desperately trying to ease the aching pain coursing throughout my body.

"I'm sorry." I choked out, "I'm so sorry, Trick. I-I don't kno—" I was cut off abruptly before I could finish, before I could break down and wallow and beg for forgiveness.

"You don't have to feel sorry for anything, Ruby. Okay? It's not your fault, it's not your fault." He repeated the sentiment a few times until I had eventually gotten it etched into my brain.

But I do know it was my fault, whatever it was, it was my fault.

It always was.

~ ~ ~

Tonight must have been a dream.

Surely, it must have been.

But then how did end up curled in a ball in Patrick Feely's bed while he got me a glass of water?

I can't even remember what happened, that's the worst part. And I always remember what happens when I'm drunk.

It's a different story when I take something but I could've sworn I didn't. . . right?

No, I couldn't have.

The last thing I remember was talking to Brooke in the kitchen.

And then drinking that whole bottle of whiskey.

You should have just stayed with Patrick.

He would have kept you safe.