I'm Not A Simp.

The base was immediately plunged into chaos with Cameramen digesting their oil as quick as possible, wrapping up any business in the bathroom, and running towards their designated squad. Even cameraman #789 was trying to make himself look presentable. 

I quickly made my way to my designated squad we were a small group of only 6 people it consisted of me, #211, #212, #789, and large cameraman #403, our squad leader was a bulky man with an outstanding but not shining gray outfit he wore on his yellow cap signaling that he was the squad leader. But what made him different is that he had a title, but like me it was one of shame. He looked at us all with his chest puffed out before playing video, on the video was a detailed plan of our goal, we were to infiltrate the east side of the would be battlefield and eliminate the Toilets in that area to stop them from sending out a warning our providing aid to Titan speakerman. Towards the end of the video we saw a slideshow of what we once had as humans and what was taken away from us. They used these slideshows as some sort of motivation to rile our spirits up for battle, it worked.

Making our way over to our designated truck we saw rows of Cameramen with their squad leaders I glanced at our squad leader I could tell how simply by the way he was walking on how important this mission was to him. He desperately wanted his blue cap back and, like me, desperately wanted a new title. It wasn't hard to know why, he was known as Crook cameraman. He earned that title after he and his old squad disobeyed a direct order to chase some Toilets he thought he had on the run. The only thing that came running was him and gallons of oil staining his clothes.

He never talked about that day, he doesn't need to, everyone knows about it. After the incident he was swiftly demoted to Buck squad leader and given a team of 'undesirables' it's a real shame that- damn he noticed me staring at him. I casted my head down feeling slightly embarrassed I would've remained like that if cameraman #211 hadn't started tugging on my shoulder.

'What's wrong?' I signed. 'I just wanted to make sure you're okay, you were staying at our leader for a while.' He signed fidgety. 'I was taking notice of his posture since this mission would no doubt be important to him.' I signed back. 'It's important to all of us... we need to get Titan speakerman back no matter what!' He pumped his hand in the air, it was pretty cute. 'I agree.' I signed and gave a thumbs up. 

Me and cameraman #211 then started talking about any worries and goals we have after this fight. For some reason when I asked him if he had any goals after the war he started fidgeting and poorly signed what he wanted to do. Something about Brownies, he probably wants to be baker but it was hard to tell after that poor translation. We would've kept talking if cameramen #212 didn't walk in front of us and take his brother's hand. He glared at me the whole time.

Once everyone was loaded up, the trucks started moving towards the upcoming battle. Cameraman #212 made sure I wasn't anywhere close to his brother and because of his interference we couldn't chat. Since I didn't want everyone to sit in awkward silence I tried striking up a conversation with #403 but he didn't budge, hell he didn't even move his arms. Out of everyone here I knew the least about him, the only piece of information I had from him was that he was the #403 large cameraman created but that was it. He never signed, he hardly moved, his outfit was so bland yet neatly kept. He was just so ordinary that you could mistake him for someone else, everyone at least tried to have some sort of personality but not him, if you're lucky he might glance at you.

Noticing that this was going nowhere I stopped, I would've started a conversation with our squad leader but he's just like #403 so I knew that it would be pointless. Defeated, I looked at cameraman #789 he looked at me before slouching in his seat signaling me to forget it. His outfit was back to its sluggish performance right after he made himself look presentable, perhaps he wanted to impress somebody but after realizing that they weren't showing decided to relax again. 

For the entirety of the truck ride everyone sat in awkward silence I could see cameraman #211 try to start a conversation with me but his brother would always make sure it didn't go anywhere so he shifted his body apologetically. Since I had no idea where we were going or how long it would take to get there I decided to power off since it won't affect my performance or anything. 

I woke up to see a cameraman #789 nudging my shoulder before realizing I was awake, once he realized he stopped and got out of the truck. I followed him and reunited with our squad. The rest of the journey was going to be a hike to our location, I put my head down to show that I was annoyed but not that anyone really cared, except for #211 he looked apologetic. The hike was terrible, my suit started getting dirty, my cooling systems were on overdrive, #212 wouldn't let him talk to #211. It was all horrible. But the worst part was the how the hike felt like hours! People will say that if your bored time will go slower, and I believe it, because this was ridiculous! And every time I looked up the ruined city didn't look any closer. 

Eventually we made it and took shelter in a building I thought we were going to relax but instead we were there to scout. I saw our designated attack zone a few blocks out. Our squad leader pulled out his zoom amplifier and attached it to his lens he then started surveying the Toilets, we also did the same. There were 2 guard Toilets for the entrance while every other Toilet was either talking or napping we stared their for a few moments making sure we didn't miss a single detail. Seemingly satisfied our squad leader stood up and assigned us 2 teams. The distraction team consisted of Me and #403 we were team 1, everyone else would follow the squad leader to the back windows would wait their for me and #403 to cause our distraction, they were team 2.

When team 2 split off from us I signed at #403 'what kind of distraction should we do.' #403 looked at me but signed nothing, instead he started walking to the Toilets. I grabbed his arm and signed 'what do you think you're doing!? We need a plan before we go up there." Again he signed nothing and started walking towards the Toilets. 

I can't believe it! I don't know what's going through his head right now! Is he trying to be cool? Because he's coming off as an ass. Since he wasn't going to listen to me followed closely behind him. Eventually he stopped and he looked at me and nodded, as if I knew exactly what he was thinking. Then he picked me up and carried me bridal style, I was about to protist when I noticed that he started walking with a limp.

Now I knew what he was thinking, we were playing the role of two injured soilders. A pretty clever idea I only wish he told me before picking me up. To get into my role I started acting dead with very shallow core circulation, but that doesn't mean I wasn't paying attention. When the Toilets noticed us they were getting ready to attack but after noticing our 'condition' they stopped but their grins grew wider, and their sounds louder. I should get an Oscar for this performance, of course if those are still a thing.

They approached us slowly, my 'heart' started beating faster and faster as the guards drew near the other Toilets did to, I couldn't help but wonder what the hell our squad leader was doing. Suddenly rubble from a destroyed building collapsed squashing one of the Toilet. Since they were all stunned team 1 used this opportunity to jump the Toilets in a wonderfully executed and coordinated move. I just wish I wasn't apart of it.

Because big old mean and hunky over here decided to host me up and toss me towards one of the Toilets. It happened so fast I didn't even have time to protect my own head! I understand the logic behind the move the move, but why did I have to be the object! I stammered to my feet my head in a daze, I was so mad at him I didn't even sign to him properly instead I glared and started throwing my hands in different directions while looking at him. To get my anger out I started bashing the living hell out of that stunned Toilets head he just threw me at.

And I would've kept going if Titan speakerman didn't suddenly smash in the building next to us.