Promise to Sirius (An Utapri / Uta no Prince-sama Fanfiction)

Camus

The butterfly was a silent liar.

It uttered vain words in vain. It crossed fingers with a hand safe in a deep, dark pocket. Its wings appeared to scintillate as they flickered but were concealing their hollow yet wavering life. It gave a perfected smile that charmed the viewers but hid a dark and hazy perspective. It was as vulnerable as it was the essence of cowardice, hiding its flaws behind insincere perfection. Blunt yet dishonest. Calm while concealing a blizzard. Soundless with an amplifying shatter. All of it was that fractured butterfly that bore the colour of ice.

As the butterfly lied alone in the puddles of the dying winter, it was no longer able to conceal its weaknesses and flaws as the white lampposts' glow fell upon its shattered wings. It had claimed to be completely pristine, but the broken cadence of its wings told a different story. It had asserted that it was undisturbed, but it was unable to soar with its body trapped under the heavy rain amidst pitch darkness. It had displayed no issue with switching between different personas, but the side that it had hidden behind layers of lies and facades had unveiled itself on the clear surface of the mirror that told no lies, displaying the cracks that could never be seen from afar. 

If Camus were to be honest, he knew that he was one of the two best at telling lies to other people if he were to compare himself with the members of the quintet. Ai would place third; Ranmaru's temper and shortage of patience would give him away; and Natsuki did not have even the slightest bit of heart to lie to anyone. That left Camus and Reiji, but while the latter was admittedly a master at utilizing red herrings and such to avert other people's eyes from what he did not wish to reveal, Camus believed that he himself was the most guilty even if they were at the same level. All five of them had deeper, broken sides to themselves, regardless if they had intentionally concealed them or unknowingly suppressed them. Each time that broken side rose to the surface, there had been shatters and tears amidst the heart-wrenching anguish and grief. Releasing something that had been kept in silence for a painstaking long period of time was neither easy nor painless, and it had never been easy in any of their cases. And now it was Camus' turn as he sat on his own king size bed with Reiji, Ai, Ranmaru, Natsuki and Alexander, warm tears threatening to slip from his eyes as his lips curved into a weak smile.

I am that butterfly. I am the silent liar.

It was simply factual. Factual and honest, both that he had completely been throughout every moment of this somewhat-unorthodox sleepover that he got to share with everyone in this room. And that included now as he curled his fingers around Natsuki's own marginally tighter, his heart squeezing in a chest devoid of even the slightest intent to lie. 

After changing colours, the butterfly is now dyed in my colour, now belonging to a heart that has told countless of lies whether through words or silence. More prideful than the red butterfly, more secretive than the lavender butterfly, darker than the green butterfly, more lost than the yellow butterfly.

The butterfly, that exact same butterfly that had appeared in his broken dreams, flashed inside his head like those near blinding lampposts, with an ice-blue colour so bright that it could have been mistaken as a terrifying white, as he relinquished another colourless breath that could barely be heard.

And now it can no longer hide.

Yet like a warm voice calling out to him, the lullaby that Natsuki had sung for him echoed with pure tenderness in his head, reaching for him and tugging him forward.

Neither does it have the will to.

"Last night, before Shinomiya and Alexander woke me up, I was trapped in a broken dream. A dream with elements that have been recurring throughout the past few weeks, whether in my dreams or thoughts."