Complicated {s.c x reader}

I walk towards the banquet hall as the room already buzzes with excited cast and crew. I try not to show it, but I am truly panicking inside. 

I've hurt my best friend. The love of my life. It feels awful.

I spot Sam sitting across the room. He's in the far right table all the way in the back with only a few people by his side. I can see from even 50 feet away how he's hiding sadness behind those deep blue eyes, and forcing a smile when someone says something to him, or cracks a joke.

My rushing thoughts are interrupted when I feel a warm hand on my arm. I rip myself from my thoughts and meet the bright eyes of Emilia.

"Hey, babe! You need help with your bags?" She says sweetly as I snatch a muffin, her attitude making me smile a bit.

"That'd be great, thanks Em." I follow her to our breakfast table, but not before Sam and I make some awkward and tense eye contact.

I can't believe I've caused him to look so miserable. That was never my intention. In fact, my intention was to get OVER him. 

"You alright? You seem a bit...distracted." Emilia asks as I unwrap my breakfast.

"Me? Ye-Fine! Fine, yeah." I struggle to speak, too focused on the script I'm trying to write in my head when I talk to Sam today.

"Y/N...tell me what's wrong. I can tell you're super out of it." Emilia sips some tea, placing her hand on mine in comfort. I look down at the muffin on my plate, too nauseous to even swallow a bite. 

My eyes meet her warm gaze once more, and I grab her hand to lead her to somewhere more private. I avoid the eyes of the other cast members when I open the doors leading to a secluded outdoor breakfast area. Not a soul was out there, so I decided it was the perfect area to spill to Emilia. 

I attempt to choke the tears back, and ignore the pulsing headache in my temple. My whole body felt numb and jelly-like as I feel panic ripple through my chest.

"I'm horrible, Emilia!" I burst, placing my hands over my eyes.

"W-What? Y/N...shh, calm down! You're not horrible by any means!" Emilia wraps her arms around me, holding me as I try not to cry.

"I am! I've done nothing but ruin things." I hug her back, speaking quietly into her shoulder.

"Y/N, you are one of my closest friends in this universe. You could do nothing to ever turn me away. I will always be here for you, no matter what you think you've done, " She squeezes both my shoulders, looking intently into my eyes, "Take a deep breath, and tell me what's the matter."

I inhale deeply, focusing on the air in my chest and not the turmoil surrounding me. When I exhale, I feel the panic leave with the air. I swallow hard before telling her what has happened.

"It all started years ago, when Sam and I were dating. I was in love with him, Em. Deeply, madly, totally in love with him. When he left, I didn't know what to do with myself. I worked my ass off to write this book, sell it, write a script, and finally make this...beautiful movie. And then, Sam walked right into the auditions. Those past feelings couldn't help be brought up again." 

I struggle to continue, but she grabs my hand and rubs it gently.

"He told me he was married. And then...he had his daughter. It was if the life I wanted with him just sailed away, and I could never reach it again." I bite my lip from stress.

"But...the divorce." She says lowly.

"Right. Oh, god, Em! I think I'm the reason he got divorced! When we started talking again, and hugging, joking, laughing, it's like we never parted all those years ago."