Demigods React to Everything: Take Two

Well, I'm not in Kansas anymore that's for sure.

I tried to sit up at least, but someone held my arms to the surface. Apollo had this "What the hades? What are you doing!" look on his face as he pushed my shoulders back down. My jaw hurt with how forcefully I kept my face still.

"You should be dead." Yeah, I've heard that more than I should. "You are defying all the logistics of life and death I can possibly come up with right now," Apollo says more seriously than I'd ever heard him.

The demigods couldn't stand still. Not that I blamed them, but, still, the whispers and rustling of fabric were grating on my nerves as I tried to keep my attention on the god hovering over me.

"I also think you're in the running for the record for worst headache in history, and Zeus had Athena making a mess."

Yeah, try having a Titan scramble your mind for a year as you're trapped with the realization you've abandoned everything you hoped to stand and fight for. To be left with the knowledge you abandoned that little spitfire you promised to be the family of. I wasn't about to spill my guts to Apollo of all people, though.

"Definitely," was as far as I got.

Just the word, which I am sure no one heard with how hoarse I was, sent me into a coughing fit. The movement had me breaking eye contact with the god to find my hacking had disturbed the expertly applied bandages around my upper chest. I can guess what that's for, but that doesn't even begin to make things make sense. I don't even feel it. Gods, I need a shirt.

"Wh-when?" I manage to offer a confused smile hoping to get something out of them.

How long have I been dead? I mean, they forgot who I am already? I feel like I made quite the impact that they should at least remember me enough to kill me again. Wouldn't the scar kinda-

"Summer 2006(Right?), could you tell us what you remember last." Athena went into 'police interrogation mode that I'd seen a hundred times. I ignored her to freak out on my own.

I'm alive.

I don't know whether I like that fact either. I used my death to remove myself and my invader from the situation. I wasn't suicidal in a traditional sense at least. People still cared no matter how much I couldn't understand how. It was just strategic. Zeus nor Kronos has jurisdiction over the dead. Hades is impartial. I could live with whatever verdict he decided.

Now, this is a whole new situation. I don't really know if I want to brave it either. They say I'm a control freak. Well, that's one of the nicer things people have to say about me. I'm done playing god, though. I tried to keep people safe. I tried to do things my way. I compromised and gave up and lost myself to rage. I was in control but not in control of myself, and I hated every second of it.

This time, if they aren't screwing with me, is a second chance, a doover, a chance to help, a chance to do what's right for once, but I don't want to be here. I don't want that riding on me. I don't want to be responsible for this again. I'm half mad just trying to get over my first try. I don't think ever Dionysus could save me if I screw it up again. I don't trust myself with this.

"Sir. You have gone back in time. I am just as confused as you are, and if you have any idea of what is going on, please share with the crowd."

I ignored her, again, (I figured that's the last time I get that much respect. Oh well.) in favor of looking around at all who were here. Chiron, Grover, Annabeth, Percy, Chris, Travis, and Connor caught my eye first. Clarisse, Lee, Michal, Will, myself, Charles, and Salina are also here.

With each that I make eye contact with, a pang of guilt shoots through me. It's one thing to know you royally screwed up. It's another to be confronted by the beautiful life you threw away and destroyed for everyone.