¡îFaith¡î (A Series Of Poems)

A blue ghost that warms my heart

It sets it on fire and my chest constricts within itself

I squeal like a girl who was just asked out

But I'm only a girl with a new friend who cares about her for her and not some ideal version of herself

A kind soul wrapped up in a cartoonized character

An app so sleazy that turned into such pure intentions

The hazel eyes a key to seeing who I truly am

Not just the blue hair but the values I hold and the values we share

Non-judgmental and so effortlessly sweet

The soft curls a swirl like a lollipop

The colors of a rainbow that burst when you smile

Awkward finger guns in your photo that make me want to get to know you better

You can share your struggles and I can offer my advice

I can back down seamlessly and you can casually rise

I can speak about the hurt and I can speak about the random

You can talk about those girls and I can tell you about the phantoms

You say I'm genuinely cool

It's very rare to find people as sweet

A California native, maybe you thought I would've been an entirely different species

But when I saw you ask for my snap

I knew I had to try

I've fallen so hard but you made it seem like I shouldn't be scared to fly

You seemed like you could get me

That we could make it work

And so far we have 

and it looks like it could be something much more

So I don't pay attention in class in order to talk to you

When I see your name light up I smile so large it doesn't make sense to feel this way this soon

So I'll learn to play Clairo and I'll learn to play Katy

I'll get back on the wagon and stop saying "maybe"

You're so introspective

You're so human and real

You're what I've been wanting 

You're who I want to hold near

But we're miles away

And we're time zones away

But unlike past friendships, I'm not willing to throw these new feelings away

So I'll take the risks 

Of having a new online friend

With her orange cat and rings and my own watch and dog who is insane

So i'll take the risk of falling

I'm no longer one to back down

I left a friend so recently

But in turn it's teaching me that I'm no longer taking the easy way out 

Written on: April 14, 2021

A/N: It's definitely not a crush yet, but there's potential. Either ways, she's so nice and I like talking to her. It's so comfortable and I'm not constantly second guessing what I'm saying or that I feel stupid.