Until the End || Levi x Reader Insert Fanfiction

Ch 5- Grief and Faith

Silence enveloped us again as the wind rushed past, and the cold air mingled on our skin. The stars watched on silently, but as the seconds raged on, you couldn't bear the silence any longer. Deciding you had tried at least to mend what little friendship you thought you had left, you quickly turned to the entrance, knowing at least he wouldn't see your tears that would humiliate you further. At least, that was what you tried to do before you were stopped by a cool hand gripping your sleeve tightly. You freeze at the strong hold Levi has on your arm before you hear him sigh behind you. "You know I hate that sappy shit," his voice was hoarse from lack of use, but his words stung you as you turned around in pure anger; anger at him. I had asked for forgiveness, had been vulnerable, and he can't even-. But before you could snap back at him, you looked into his eyes, and he stared back at you in... remorse?

"I don't blame you, and I don't hate you," Levi mutters as you freeze at his words but don't interrupt. "It was my fault. I left you, and I left them when I should've known-" he grips his hands into tight fists as his knuckles slowly turn white. His eyes turn dangerous as you see a flash of anger before it fades into guilt. "Don't you understand?" he looks at you, imploring you to, "People who stay by me, people who follow me- I'm a danger to you. It's better for you without me." You look up at him, his eyes flashing with rare emotion, and realise he had held onto guilt of his own, pushing you away to spare him any more hurt. You sigh as you grip one of his clenched fists firmly and feel them loosen in your hold. "I thought you hated that sappy shit," you whisper though he doesn't reply.

"Levi, have faith in me." you find yourself reciting the words Furlan had said before the Exhibition. Have faith in us. You feel him tense slightly at the words. "Their death, it wasn't your fault." You look up from his hand to his vacant eyes, "It wasn't mine either," you feel your voice break at that, "we had faith in them, like they had faith in us, and we all made our own decisions." You see his conflict with your words, "We wanted to be free." You see his eyes prick slightly as tears run along the rims of his eyes, and despite your surprise at his show of vulnerability, you give him a soft smile despite everything. Despite our loss. Despite the heaviness of our hearts. "I'm here, though, with you," you whisper, "and you can push you away, but I will still fight by you, and I will still follow you." He meets your eyes in slight surprise, "Until the end." You can see his eyes flicker, still conflicted, before sighing deeply. "Tch," he looked at the hand that you held as his form seemed to wither with its familiarity. "It'll probably be a shitty end," he mutters lowly, and you can't help but laugh quietly, "I know."

"I'm glad it wasn't you," he whispers, squeezing your hand subtly, probably thinking back to your previous words. I wish it was me. You think back to the overwhelming relief that filled his eyes after he had gotten rid of the Abnormal Titan and the way he had gripped onto you as you had him. You remember your overwhelming guilt and the way he had protected you.

"I know."

.....

[Six Years Later]

The year was now 850. You trotted down the path on your horse, which you had decided to name [h/n], and found yourself next to a horse that was coloured pure midnight. Levi looked up at you, and you saw his eyes soften slightly from his piercing glare. You had teased him about it before, only to get smacked in the face by a sponge and told to keep cleaning. A lot had happened in the six years that followed that night on the rooftops. You and Levi were now Co-Captains of the Special Operations Squad that consisted of Eld, Oluo, Petra and Gunther.

Originally, Erwin had thought that you and Levi were capable of leading our own squads as Captains, and you had agreed, seeing as our skills were unmatched by the majority of the Scouts, with yours being more on speed and Levi being... Levi. However, both Erwin and you were unsurprised when Levi had fought for you to be in his squad. You had no objections as such, as you kept to your word that you would follow and fight with Levi, and what better way to be by each other's side than to be in the same squad? Nonetheless, Erwin had relented, allowing the both of us to Co-Captain the Special Operations Squad.