Abducted: Part Two SPN | Dean x Reader | Slow Burn

March 2015

Dean stopped to calm himself down, exhaling loudly before he continued. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to yell..." He looked through the rearview mirror, presumably to look at Sam. "I'm also sorry for the way I handled things..."

Dean cleared his throat. "It really isn't you..." You rolled your eyes. "It's me, because I'm dangerous. I hurt Charlie, physically, and I'm scared it could be you next time..." His lips upturned into a smile. "You were right, about that..."

Hearing him tell you that didn't make you feel any better. He'd lied to you and put you through so much unnecessary hurt because of it. For now, you had nothing to say to him.

"I already hurt you once when I set off your protection spell and I could never forgive myself if I hurt you again... But, Charlie and Sam have both told me since, that I was an idiot to push you away the way I did, when it's obvious to them, how I feel about you... I miss you like crazy sweet..." Dean shook his head, stopping himself before he could finish the name you'd asked him not to call you anymore.

"Look. I miss you, okay..." He continued. "I didn't want to push you away but I've got this fucking mark on me and there's no point starting anything with anyone while I have it... So I lied, and turned you down and I'm sorry... You think things have been awkward for you? I've been watching you, knowing I upset you and let you down, and I hated every second of it..."

Dean had been holding the steering wheel with only his left hand as he frequently did. His right had been resting on his thigh and you watched on as he moved it over to grab hold of yours. Interlocking your fingers as he had done that night on the way to Junction City. "The hugs, when I kissed you, that was all real... I wasn't trying to lead you on like I said..."

"But until I loose this tramp stamp," He raised your hand with his. As if you could forget about the Mark of Cain on his right arm. "I can't give you much more than this. Just know, that I really wanted to continue where we left off that night in the real estate..." His fingers squeezed yours. "And I hope you'll wait for me to get rid of this fucking mark, so then someday, we can get our 'later', and maybe more?"

You were trying to take it all in. And your silence seemed to make him nervous because he began again. "So I tell you all that and you're just gonna leave me hanging?"

You thought for a second, your lips forming a quick smile as a huff escaped them. You added cheekily. "What you think I plan on hooking up with some other guy or something?" He looked at you half amused, half disappointed when you looked up to meet his eyes. "Bit hard to do something like that with you and Sam not letting me out of your sight."

That made him laugh. "Now that would be awkward. Having to watch you bang some other dick."

You closed your eyes and wiggled your head slightly to shake that thought away. You then moved both your joined hands to jab him in the leg at that. "Nice word play." Dean just smirked.

"I've missed you too. Hanging out with you, all of it really. Not just what almost happened... So if you mean what you just said, about waiting till you're free of the mark, then I don't mind waiting for you. But I won't wait forever either..." I'm not that pathetic, you added mentally. Am I?  You didn't have much choice in the matter considering your circumstances.

You sighed. "Just so you know though, the balls in your court. I won't be making any more plays, like the one at the Real Estate... You wanna hold hands like this, fine, but until I know that it's definitely 'later' I won't be instigating anything... Deal?" You waited patiently for him to confirm.

Dean squeezed your hand again. "Deal... I can't believe we have a fucking code word for it... Later?" He mused.

He really did care for you. There was no doubt in your mind now. He'd made it perfectly clear that he had pushed you away because of what he'd done to Charlie that night. It wasn't something he wanted to do either by the sounds, but in his mind it was the best way to ensure your safety. And that just made you admire him more.