Home Is When I'm With You - Cynonari

[Chapter 25 is finally out!! A month late...!! I'm sorry about the once-again month-late chapter, and I'm afraid not much to show for it. 

I should start counting how many times I apologize for late chapters. 

And I'm afraid, some bad news. The next few chapters, though not too many remain, will be very slow. I'm getting into some pretty big exams soon and won't have the time or mind to focus on writing. I'll do what I can where I can but it will likely be quite a while before the next few chapters come out. So, I apologize for that.

But thank you all for the endless and amazing support. All the votes and all the fun comments (seriously, I love reading your comments, I read all of them), thank you. So, without further a due, chapter 25: What Remains.]

Cyno pov

The days were agonisingly slow. Like some greater power had decreased the speed the world ran. It had barely even been a week since Tighnari's departure. But it felt far longer. I'd never known myself to be so impatient before. Going through the motions of daily life felt so wrong. Everything felt off. Dull. boring. That was when things were going okay. Other times I'd think too much about Tighnari's absence and I would be overcome with sickening dread. A pit would form in my stomach and nausea would creep up my throat.

What's more, the world had also never felt quite so repetitive. It felt like the same tasks, same meals, same feelings and the same interactions with the same people daily for a week. Not that I was doing very much talking, to begin with.

I also had way too much free time. I had a job. Of course. I had studying to do as well. But it was the holidays and being in a low-level position meant there really wasn't much to do, workload-wise. I'd praised that a few months ago, but now I was cursing it. Especially without Tighnari here, I didn't know how to spend my time. Not that I could be sure he wanted to spend his time with me even if he was here. I still wasn't quite on great terms with Kaveh and Alhaitham. And it's not like I had any other friends.

The worst of it was that I had no idea when Tighnari was coming back. Or in other words, the hopeful end of my torment. But the whole idea led to something else. I wasn't even sure if he was coming back. I mean, I expected him to, of course. But that didn't stop my subconscious mind from occasionally entertaining the thought. I didn't even know he planned on leaving. Which only added to my anxiety. What if he intentionally hadn't told me he was leaving? Sure for quite a while we weren't talking. But he had the time when we had...spent that night together. I could only hope that he had simply forgotten.

Today was particularly bad. I hadn't received any work. And I wasn't behind on any. So I decided to study. But my wandering mind had refused such a task. Around midday after sitting around and getting nothing done. I decided to take a walk to clear my mind. Which in the end was no help and only worsened my distraction.

I lay in bed staring at the ceiling. A book lay next to me, open on the fourth page, that was about as far as I managed to make it.

I heard my stomach rumble. I sat up to look out the window. Before I'd even realised it, the evening had crept up on me. I realised, in my stupor, I hadn't felt like eating all day. Even if it was small, it would probably be good to put something in my empty stomach.

I pushed myself up and made my slow trudge towards the cafeteria. 

Once I arrived, I noticed the hall was almost empty as dinner was going to end soon, so it was fairly quick getting the food and finding an empty table in some dark corner. The cafeteria was quiet and peaceful sub for the few mumblings of small groups scattered about. The dim lights comforted my agitated mind as I picked through my food.