When It's Time. | SEULRENE

Seulgi's POV 

I stand behind her, waiting for her to open her room. She look behind me.

"Is there something wrong?" I ask. She smiled and shook her head.

"This is the first time again that we're together in a different place other than our own. I just realized that" she said before opening up the room. We both entered.

"Can we talk about it now?" I asked  her.

She nodd and we both settled in the couch. I can sense her still being hesitant.

"You know I would understand, right?" I assure her. "Whatever it is Hyun, I will understand." She chuckled.

"You're always that Seulgi." She said. "That's why I'm scared of telling you because maybe this time you won't."

"It couldn't be that bad." I said to her.

"You were so excited to debut that time. I didn't even knew you would still talk to me after I left. I took my chance contacting you, expecting to get ignored but it was the opposite that happened."

"I've been with you longer than I wasn't. Did you really think I would forget and ignore you, just because we never talk for a few years?" How would I even do that, when there's truth to all the teasing the girls throw at me.

"No, but you should've at least been upset with what I've done. You should've hated me after that."

"I was disappointed, not upset, and would never hate you for anything."

"Don't you think I was selfish? We were set to debut already, before I left."

"I'm sure you have your reason and that's what me and the girls are holding on to, until now."

"I do, but I don't know if it's something you would understand Seul." She look down. 

"Try me. You wouldn't know if you won't tell me."

"They found out something about me." She started. 

"Who? The management?" She nodded. What she said next made me froze  

"It was either, I'll voluntarily leave alone or they'll remove you from the company along with me."

"W-what?" That can't be, we were both promised to debut together.

"You were one step closer to your dream already Seul--"

"You were too!" I can't help but raise my voice. "It was your dream too Joohyun!" She look up to me.

It seems like she forgot about that part. She said she was selfish with the choice she have made, but why was she the one that left? Why did she end up leaving all of it behind?

"A dream I built with you. It will never be the dream if you're not in it with me Seulgi. You were the only person that got me to stick through with it."

"And did you think you were not that to me?" I ask her. "Hyun, it got so hard for me when you left."

"But you've made it Seulgi." She held my hand. "You've made it." She said it proudly.

"Alone." I said to her. "I got to do it all alone. Even if I had the girls' support, it wasn't enough Hyun." I honestly told her.

This is probably the first time we're talking about the past. Every time I started the topic before, she'll only find a way to avoid it. I realized that our conversations would go on longer when we're not talking about the past, that's why I just chose not to even try anymore. But this time...

"I only got the drive to debut as solo when I saw you debut as an actress." I confessed. "I hoped that maybe if I get to debut, it'll be much easier for me to get to you."

I can tell she was surprised at what I had said.

"You're right. We built that dream together but I was willing to build another one, if it means you get to stay by my side. Living a dream without you was never a choice for me." I may be lowkey confessing what I feel for her but it doesn't matter, as long she knows how important she is in my life.

Staring at her, seeing her smile grow at the words I just said, makes me feel at ease now.

I get to finally told her my side. I hope she won't be scared on how I will react anymore.

"You never fail to get to me, Kang Seulgi." She said and gave my hand squeeze. 

"Can you tell me?" I ask look up to her. "What did they learn about you?"

She just stare at me for a minute, I waited for her...

"If I tell you, will you stay?" She said. "If I tell you, will this relationship remain the same? Will you be able to accept me and every thing that I feel since then?" I can feel her nervousness in the sound of her voice. I give her an assuring smile. 

"Like I said, try me." 

"I'm gay." She's looking directly into my eyes, like she's trying to get a reaction only from there. 

I'd say I'm a little surprise, but am I really? I mean she's never been in a relationship with anyone, at least in my eyes and that's the truth. 

"Like, you like girls?" I questioned. She slowly move her hands away from me. She hummed and nodded in response. "You've dated Minho Oppa and Bogum--"

"You know those were never true Seulgi." I smiled when she rolled her eyes at me and sighed. 

"It was all true in the eyes of the public." I tease, trying to change up the mood. 

But looking at her reaction at my teasing, she looks disappointed, so I stopped. 

"Mianhe." I said. I reach for her hand and hold it. "But, you know what? That's not something you should be scared of saying Hyun, specially to me. I'm not going away just because you're gay." I might be spending more time with her, to shoot my shot. It works greatly in my favor. "Is that the reason they made you chose? Because they were scared you might fall in love with one of us and they can't bare that?" 

"Actually--"

"They really--"

We spoke at the same time. She gestured me to be one to continue.

"I've always known they are cruel, I mean I heard, but not to this extent."

"Yet you were still planning on renewing your contract." She said. "I heard you and your make up artist."

"Because they agreed to all my conditions. I really didn't find a reason to leave, but now I do. If they didn't want you because of that reason, might as well leave."

I don't want to end up in the news because I was kicked out for being gay. I'd much prefer to be in it for proudly coming out as being one.