抖阴社区r's Block (Complete)

Chapter 18

"Stop and think," He says calmly, his hands still in the air, palms still facing me. "Ten years ago, where was I?"

I shake my head rapidly, trying to fight the disabling thoughts of Alex being the one that hurt me. My sanity hangs by a thread as I try to unscramble the mess inside my mind.

"Alright, let me remind you. I wasn't drinking, I had been with you all night. Remember we went for a swim behind this cabin and made love on the beach right back there. Why would I rape you, Trina....? You were mine?" His hands drop along with my heart and my body as I slide to the floor in tears.

Alex slowly steps closer before sliding to the floor beside me. I don't wait for him to ask permission I slide into his lap, wrapping my arms around his waist. "I'm sorry, I'm so scared," I finally admit after pretending none of this bothered me all night. He already knew that though; the proof was in the claw marks I left on his face back at my parents' house.

A few hours later, Alex has my laptop set up on the kitchen table, he's making a list of names, men that either wear military style boots or are in the military. He writes a second list of those that he knows for a fact attended that party on the beach that night, and another list of those he knows were on the island. Once those lists are made he checks the first list, making marks by those that are in the other lists.

"The men with their names crossed out were nowhere near this island. They were either on base or otherwise detained by the military. Those with the asterisk were at the party and have not been questioned yet. The ones that are marked out have been questioned and offered their DNA that leaves the ones with nothing to question and get their DNA samples," Alex explains to me as I look over his shoulder at his list.

I start pacing, chewing on my nails, "There's one person not on that list, that is your height, your build and is a Marine, meaning he wears the same boots that you do," I ramble, praying I'm not right but we can't leave anyone off that list or we might as well end this now.

I hear Alex's chair slide on the bare plywood floor, but I don't turn toward him knowing his face will show his shock. "You're right, I'll add Mason," he says sounding upset but soon I hear him typing on the computer.

He sit for a moment staring at the computer screen, all of the names on there are people we've known for most of our lives. I know he's having a hard time thinking any of them could be capable of this but sadly, one of them is and now he's returned, either to scare me into giving up or to finish what he started with that tiny cut he made on my throat. I reach up mindlessly rubbing my throat where the knife bit into it just a little more scared than I was a few minutes ago.

"I guess I had better head out," Alex says after saving the list onto a flash drive.

"Don't leave me." The words barely a breath but his nod tells me that he heard me.

I turn, heading to my bedroom when I hear the click of the front door as he locks it. The lights go out in the kitchen as I step past the threshold of my bedroom door. I unzip one of my suit cases and dig inside for something to wear to bed. I dig frantically, wondering where all of my sleep clothes are buried when Alex's hand grabs mine, stopping my search.

"I will sleep in my old bedroom," he says before stepping away.

"I'm afraid to be alone," I admit in a small guarded voice and feel like an idiot, like a child afraid of the dark.

Alex looks back at me his hand flying to the back of his neck rubbing it. That's always been a telltale sign that he's just a little uncomfortable.

"Geez Alex, you're acting like you're afraid of me."

A strained chuckle rumbles from his throat. "To be honest Trina, there isn't much in this world that I am afraid of, but you are right there at the top of that list." He moves closer to the bed before letting himself drop on it, hanging his head, while wringing his hands. "You turned my world inside out and left me a mess."

I drop to my knees placing my hands on his knees, "I know, I'm...."

He places his finger on my lips, keeping me from speaking. "Let me say what I have to say before I decide against it." I nod and wait for him to speak again. "Since you've been back you've turned my world inside out yet again. When Sabastian came to my office and told me what happened it gutted me. I wasn't sure if I wanted to kill you for running away because of this or pull you in my arms to protect you from further harm."

He stood up pacing the floor, rubbing the back of his neck again. "Since then, we've been reckless, we've gotten drunk and had unprotected sex, I've given you a job at my office and basically built you a house," he says spinning around with his hands in the air at the work that's been done on the cabin. I'm not quite sure he's even talking to me anymore, but I continue to sit there on the floor and listen. This is a conversation that he obviously needs to have.

"I've spent all of my days and most of my nights in pursuit of the man that hurt you, who could be one of my closest friends and yet knowing that it probably is...." He pauses before turning to look down at me. "Knowing that, makes me want to kill him but it  still doesn't hurt as much as it does every damn time I see you walk into a room." He takes a few steps closer and drops to his knees in front of me. "What do you want, Trina? I'm a broken man, I can't continue to pretend that this," He says waving his arms between us, "is ok, because it's not. You want me to sleep in the bed beside you, then you damned well better be prepared to stick around this time because until I hear those words coming out of your mouth, I can't."