Q?U?E?E?N {Noah Puckerman/Glee} {Book 1}

Did I kiss a girl other than Santana? Mhm I did, yup. Did she kiss back? Yes she did. Was it hot? 100%, it was hella sexy I won't lie. Was it Quinn? Yup. Did I have Puck sitting in the back of my mind saying 'oof that's hot. Girl on girl action?' Yes I did.

"We don't mention this to anyone. That's a promise" she whispers, before kissing my lips again. My cheeks heat up and I nod, "o-of course". I swallow the lump in my throat and let her go. She walks out leaving me alone in bathroom.

Not even Finn. No way would you tell Finn. Or kurt. They're both definite no's. I exit the bathroom, crashing into Puck of course.

"Hey sweetheart" he smirks down at me, "I think you owe someone an apology" he chuckles. "The apology's at your house, tonight actually" I play with the hem of his shirt, chewing my bottom lip flirtatiously. "After school?" He tries. I shake my head, "when I feel like it" I shrug, walking away.
***
"Him again?" Santana sighs, "we both know, you'd rather spend your night with me" she looks me up and down, laughing. Do we? A genuine question playing in my head, because at the moment I don't even know.

"I owe him" I roll my eyes. "Why?" She scoffs, giving me a bored look. "I accused him of telling everyone about the whole Sam and me thing" I explain, finishing my makeup. "Wait it wasn't him?" She looks even more surprised when I tell her it was Sam.

She stops to think about it, then shrugs "it makes sense, I guess." I continue explaining the whole story, excluding the whole kissing thing - obviously. Quinn's lips are really soft. I feel a tingling sensation around my mouth, like they're lonely - they miss some sort of physical affection. My brain pauses. Affection? It was anything but affection. It meant nothing to either of us - it was just a kiss and maybe a make out but it's just a girl helping a girl out. Sexual frustration! That's it, you get it right?

"You alright?" Santana asks. I nod,standing up "I'm gonna go, I'll see you tomorrow. Maybe tomorrow night can be for us?" I suggest, kissing her cheek. "It better be" she kisses my cheek back.
***
The next few hours consisted of hooking up with Puck. Then a round two. Then a short round three. Then cuddling in his bed. Talking.

"Is it deep midnight conversation time yet?" I hum in response adding "I guess so."

"Why don't you love anyone?" My heart increases in speed. Nobody ever asks that, it's like an unwritten rule. How do I answer this? "I can't be bothered" I shrug, playing with his hands - comparing the size of his to mine. "I think that's bullshit" he admits, grabbing my hand. I try to pull it out of his grasp, "I think you're scared." He kisses each of my fingers, I want to feel uncomfortable, I want to yell at him and call him a liar, that what he's saying isn't true. But I don't. I feel comfortable. I feel happy that someone is identifying an issue I face, but it's too fast.

"Stop" my voice shakes, "don't go there. Not now, just leave it for now. Another time" I exhale slowly. "Do - do you think you'd ever love me?" I wanna punch myself. What the fuck is wrong with me? Why would you ever ask that?

"I think I could. If you just opened up. If you stopped hooking up with everyone just to hide" he answers. Who is this? Noah, this is Noah. The real him. A person I really need right now, but won't accept into my heart because that opens me up to potential hurt and pain. And I can't handle that. I don't want that ever.
***
I'm trying to make up for all the months I missed. This chapter to me is alright. I know it's going a little fast, but I want to introduce Lena more and help understand her character. Her thoughts, her actions. How she feels for Puck and how she really does feel for him but won't show it. I want her to hurry up and be vulnerable and I'm sorry if this is too fast for you - but I also think that this won't be a super long story. It depends honestly -   💕   H    💕