Finding Me (Todoroki x Reader)

Chapter 72

Releasing a shaky breath, I let go of Shoto, and straightened up. He noticed, and quickly straightened up, too.

"Shoto," I said. "You couldn't helpme at camp - before all hell broke loose - because I didn't want you to help."

His brows furrowed. "What? Why?"

"Because... I was hurting because of you."

I waited for any kind of response: a retort, a release of breath, anything. But nothing, not even a squeak of surprise escaped him. I was only met with a blank face and a fiery stare.

I took in another deep breath to calm my nerves before continuing. 'Man, this is harder than I thought it would be.'

"You weren't hurting me on purpose; no, you were just... being you, and I... Well, let's just say what normally would be a topic to talk about with your best friend became something I couldn't tell anyone. Not even you.

"When that villain - All for One - was draining me last night, I thought about my parents, and all our friends, and... you."

"You did?" Shoto asked, although his voice sounded strangled.

A single tear dripped down my S/C skin as I smiled, albeit sadly. "Yes! Yes, you were on my mind when all I could see was darkness, Shoto. I was so scared - not for myself - but for Bakugou, and also the fact that I would never be able to tell you how I... how I..."

'Just say it. Say it, damnit! '

I jumped when Shoto's calloused hands grabbed onto mine, finding him suddenly closer than he had been two seconds ago.

"How you... what?" he muttered, breath brushing my skin like angel wings. Light and feathery and almost non-existent.

'Say it... Say it...'

"H-How I really feel about you..." I managed out, finding it very hard to breath, suddenly.

"And how do you really feel about me?"

"Stop denying it! Stop denying your feelings for Todoroki!"

Gulping down the remaining fear inside of me - its heavy weight on my shoulders finally lifting off - I said, "I really like you, Shoto Todoroki. I like you more than just as my best friend, and I have for a while now."

We both sat in silence, with me holding my breath as I awaited Shoto's response. It was as if time had stopped, for the brief moment it was from one breath to the next felt like an eternity. He wasn't responding; he wasn't doing anything, actually, and that told me more than enough of what he felt. 'He doesn't feel the same.'

I lowered my gaze from him, letting that sinking feeling of rejection settle in.

"That's why I couldn't tell you," I murmured, slipping my hands out of his. "Because... how could I tell my best friend that I had a crush on him, especially when other girls were in the picture."

It was silent for another moment, and I honestly thought about just leaving - saving myself anymore embarrassment - before I was stopped by a familiar, hoarse voice.

"You really can be stupid, can't you, Y/N?"

That took me aback. "W-What?!"

I watched with wide, confused eyes as Shoto started laughing - a full and warm sound that echoed throughout the courtyard. His smile was blinding, but I couldn't tear my stunned eyes away from it, not even for a second.

He let out a few more chuckles before speaking again. "You said you couldn't speak to me about this because you thought other girls were in the picture."

"Well.. weren't there-"

"Y/N... there never was anyone else. Ever."

My mouth opened and closed, but nothing came out. I was like a guppy floundering about for water, unable to find any. What the heck was he saying? And why was he laughing?

Shoto grabbed my hand again, his warmth and coolness sending shivers through me.

"You know I'm not the greatest at showing my emotions," he said, "but even I thought I was being obvious."

"In what?"

"In my feelings for you, dummy. What else would I mean?"

A dumbfounded, giddy grin twitched at the corner of my lips, my eyes widening as the weight of his words hit me.

"So... are you saying that you like me back?" I asked tentatively, mustering the last of my courage to look him in the eyes.

Shoto suddenly turned bright red, his skin going as dark as the red scar that surrounded his cerulean blue eye. He averted his eyes briefly, lowering his head in the slightest before glimpsing back up at me.

"I told you I had something to tell you after all of this was over," he muttered. " Well, there it is..."

Thinking about it now, he was right: he had been obvious this whole time. The times I thought he was looking at Momo, he was looking at me instead; every little wave and smile reserved for me; his overprotectiveness; the Field Gamma chat; the intense conversations we'd had prior to the League attacking us; his fear-stricken face as I fell in darkness...

He'd felt the same for me all along, and I only had myself to blame for being too stupid to realise sooner.

For the first time in a few days, I smiled. I smiled so brightly and so wide I felt my skin stretch further than should be normal, and my chapped lips split, letting drops of blood erupt on the dry surface. But I didn't care, not a single bit.

I cried out as I leapt into Shoto's arms, burying my head in his chest as I bound my arms around him tightly. He was stunned for a second, but quickly wound his arms around me as well, pulling me into his warm and cool embrace. Still was a weird sensation up until now, but that was okay. It was just... him.

"I'm sorry," I whispered, but I knew Shoto had heard me. "I'm so sorry, for everything, Shoto. I'm sorry for making you feel like I couldn't trust you, and for not being able to tell you the truth. I'm sorry that my brain was such a mess, and that I couldn't pick up on the signs sooner. I'm sorry that I was distant, and not myself, and everything else that caused you to worry. You shouldn't have had to. And I'm sorry that I wasn't a very good friend - a very good best friend.

"I'm so sorry for causing you pain. Believe me, I never intended it go this way. But since it's kind of all worked out... can you ever forgive me?"

Shoto's chuckles vibrated through his chest and into me as he laughed, a deep, comforting sound that I hoped to hear again soon.

"Yes," he said. "I can forgive you, but only if you go on a date with me. I-I mean, if you want to..."

Pulling myself away from him, I nodded, still smiling.

"I would love to, Shoto."