spectrum【fem!reader .lookism】

. i

Maybe if he learns to take matters in his own hands, she'd actually look a bit more warmly at him.

The first thing she did as soon as she was out of school it to make a beeline for the nearest store to buy a lollipop.

With how much everything makes (Y/N)'s blood pressure rise, she thinks she might as well deserve a good smoke. She heard those things could help alleviate stress, even if it was temporary.

Except she knew her mother would not be happy if she did so. Besides, the long-term effects would cost more money than she'd like, and that is just a definite "no".

Lollipops are the next best thing.

"Hello (Y/N)," the cashier greeted her cheefully, already used to her constant presence.

"Good evening."

"The usual?"

"Yes please."

The lady smiled as she scans the pack that (Y/N) brought to the counter. "Not all the teens these days would choose alternatives rather than smoke. You really are a good child, (Y/N)."

A good child, huh.

"How about it? Did you change your mind about working part-time? I could raise the salary if you want. With your face, I'm sure you are bound to attract a few more costumers!"

"You flatter me too much, ma'am," she sighs. "Thank you for always looking out for me. My current job is already paying enough, and if I take more, I might be unable to spend enough time with my family."

The lady sniffs. "I wish my child is as filial as you."

"He'd come around eventually."

"I would hope so."

(Y/N) paid for her lollipops and left the woman snorting in her own thoughts.

It was already dark when she returned to their little home.

Sometimes, (Y/N) wonders to herself why her mom still chose to adopt her even when they were already barely getting by with only two people in the house. She knew how the woman was suffering by herself.

Maybe it was her guilt that made her stand up and look for a job to carry her own weight in their household.

(Y/N) already owes so much to her mom. She was given a warm home to return to, she was showered with love she thought she'd no longer receive. It was only right that she does something back for that kindness.

The girl heard a concerning yell as soon as she nears the house.

Her hearbeat raced urgently as she walks faster. There was a sense of apprehension and worry that something happened to her adoptive mother.

But (Y/N)'s hand stopped just as it gripped the doorknob.

An angry, yet familiar voice drifted to her ears.

"Is it my fault we have no money?!"

That was...Daniel, wasn't it?

What was that guy doing again?

A loud sound echoed in the house as (Y/N) allows the door to creak open. She caught sight of her brother punching the wall angrily as if it would solve his problem.

She caught sight of their mom's movements halting from washing the dishes.

"What have you ever done for me?"

(Y/N) felt something crack. It was probably the lollipop in her mouth. She must've accidentally bitten it too hard.

She can see how their mother tenses at the words thrown at her. She did not even bother trying to defend herself, only listening to the son that threw out blame after blame for the misfortune that befell him.

With each passing second, (Y/N) felt her anger rising.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" she fumed from the doorway.

Both occupants of the room froze at the sound of her voice. Daniel abruptly turned his head to look it her, while their mom hung her head shamefully, knowing that her daughter heard the conversation.

"(Y/N) - "

"You - ungrateful..." Words almost failed her with how furious she felt. (Y/N)'s glare was venomous and hateful towards her own brother.

What kind of son would yell at his mother and put all the burdens on her?

Didn't he see how lucky he was, that he is still getting something despite their state?

Did he not know how he was living a life far better than other people?

"Ungrateful what?" Daniel echoed. "You don't have the right to criticize me, (Y/N). You always pretend as if I don't exist in school!"

Of course she would! What kind of person would be proud to admit that her older brother is a loser that knows nothing but to complain and complain and blame everything on the world and his mom?!

Just because he's unfortunate doesn't mean he could give up so easily and scorn others!

"You—!"

"(Y/N)," their mom's soft voice cut through. She stops midway from grabbing her brother's collar and tossing him away. "It's enough."

Maybe it was the sadness in her voice that really stopped the younger girl.

(Y/N) decidedly storms away and shuts herself in her room, heart heavy and uncaring if she skips dinner.

She wasn't angry at her mother. No, the teen could never be angry at her. Her mom has sacrificed far too much, and has given more than she can give. She was too kind, too gentle. She keeps burning and burning to give warmth, not realizing how she will one day run herself dry.

(Y/N) doesn't want to see that day. She doesn't want the time to come when the only person who reached out for her would finally collapse.

Unfortunately, it seems like her brother doesn't share the same sentiment.

Daniel Park may be her brother, but she cannot find it in her to treat him as such.

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Unedited