Push On Through

*Take this as your next TW! I tried to warn you*

-Tyler's P.O.V-

We just got pack from dinner, Josh is staying over in the room next to mine, but we're not sleeping yet so he's in my room, just talking to me about random things. Not long after we got back we heard a bang come from my sisters room, Josh told me not to check on her as it may have been that she dropped something. I'm worried though and the thought that she isn't well again keeps crossing my mind. But she would tell me if she isn't well again, right? I don't know. I have to trust her and not pry. If I poke my nose where it isn't wanted she may not trust me or may not wish to speak to me in future. I think Josh can tell that I am worrying, he comes over to me and sits down on the bed

"She will talk to you if she isn't right, you have to trust her buddy" Josh softly speaks, like him being soft with me will help. 

"But will she, you remember what happened last time right? I almost lost her Josh!" I try to get my point across by raising my voice a little. 

"I was there, I remember it all too well Tyler, but you have to trust her" 

"What if I can't? I can't lose her, I already lost mum and dad, I can't lose my baby sister too!" I rest my head in my hands, almost in tears at the thought of losing her. 

// Flashback to December // 

I pace the waiting room in the Emergency Room, walking up and down the corridor. I need news. I need answers. She needs to be okay. I found my little sister Ruby unconscious on her bathroom floor. She has blood on her wrists and thighs, as well as foam coming out her mouth. She had tried to take her own life. I know she was going through some things after her relationship ended but I didn't realise how much it affected her. I managed to put her in my car and I almost got a speeding ticket just getting her here. An ambulance would have taken far too long. How could she do this to herself? How could I not notice she felt this way again. This isn't the first time something like this has happened either. She tried to kill herself years ago as well due to the bullying and stress at school, but she got through that, mum and dad made sure of it. But mum and dad aren't here to save her now. I am. I have to save her. 

I see a doctor come out from the doors they took her through. It's been about an hour since I got here, Josh came not long after as I called him on my way to the hospital. The doctor walks over to us.

"Family for Ruby Joseph?" He asks, looking at me, I nod my head. He gestures for me and Josh to follow behind him. They better be taking us to see her. She better be okay. I will be so fucking angry at her when she wakes up. If she does. They bring us into a room, there's a lot of beeping and wires coming out of her. She's laying there with a tube down her throat that's breathing for her. The doctor tries to explain what happened to her body, she has to be in a medical coma for a few days so her body can recover. But she is alive, thank the fucking lord. I go over to the chair beside her bed, I hold her hand in mine and kiss the back of it. I've felt like this before and I can't even imagine how she must have felt. 

//Back to present day// 

"You remember what happened last time, she nearly died Josh, I had to rush her to the fucking hospital" She left a note too, I didn't see it when I first got to her, but it was on her bed with my name on it, Josh got it when he went to mine to grab me and Ruby some clothes. I still have that note in a drawer in my room. She went to therapy for a couple months after but then stopped as she was 'better' which I think is complete bullshit. 

"Okay fine, we can try and keep an eye on her together and if there is anything that flags up we will sit her down together and talk to her, okay?" He tries to calm me down again, he has a point. 

"If she doesn't come to us and we notice something we talk to her. Sounds like a good plan. I just hope she talks to us first. I would hate having to throw an intervention just to get her to open up to us" 

"Yeah me too, but we can't have a repeat of last time, she deserves the world, we will make her believe she is lovely, she is an amazing person Tyler, we have to make her see that!" Josh puts his hand on my shoulder as he stands up and heads toward the door "I'm going to bed now, we have to be up early, so set your alarm buddy" He leaves the room, and leaves me to my own thoughts again. 

This would be the time I check if I have everything packed for tour, but I already know I do. I have checked things every day for the past week just to make sure. I have absolutely everything I could possibly need and more. I should probably get some sleep now so that I am not a tired boy for tomorrow. I turn my light off and get under my covers. I scroll through my phone for a bit before deciding to turn it off for the night. 

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I wake up to my alarm going off, I don't have a typical alarm sound, I choose to have music as my alarm, although this particular morning my phone decides to play Bring Me The Horizon and it startles me awake. I turn the alarm off and groan. I then remember it's the start of tour, I have to get ready so we can head to the bus. I manage to crawl out of bed and make my way to the bathroom to brush my teeth and use the toilet. I need to pick out something comfy to wear. I choose a sweat set, most comfortable thing I own that isn't already packed. As I leave my room I bump into Josh who is already dressed, full of energy and dragging his suitcase and bags down to the van. He looks up at me as he walks down the stairs and smiles, then carries on walking. How has he got so much energy at 7am? No clue. I go back into my room and grab my suitcase and bags and start dragging them out and down the stairs. I look around and try to find Ruby but I don't think she is up yet. She has to be, we need to leave in 30 minutes. 

I walk back up the stairs and go to her door. I knock softly at first, she doesn't answer. I knock again and get a groan.  "Come on Rubes, we need to leave in 30 minutes, it's tour day" I shout through the door. I can hear her groan again and then I hear movement.

 I go back down the stairs and help Josh load the van. Our manager sent a van to us so we can take our stuff to where the bus is parked up. I hear some movement from upstairs and then Ruby makes an appearance. Dressed in a black sweat suit with her vans. I go back up to help her with her bags as she looks like she's struggling. She normally has more muscle than me, I hope she's alright. Maybe she's just tired. I load her things onto the van, I lock up the house and jump in the van with the others, shutting the door and putting my seatbelt on. I look over to Josh and see him smiling. 

"Let's get this show on the road!" He laughs at his own joke, Ruby and me roll our eyes at him. Far too much energy.