Push On Through

Glowing Eyes

"Earth to Tyler? Are you there?" Josh asks me, waving now. 

"I can still see you, you idiot" I snap a little. 

"Jeez, just wondered if you wanted to play with us?" Josh is practically handing me the controller in his hand. I lock my phone, shoving it in my pocket. I stand up and grab the controller from his hand, sitting down next to my sister. She looks at me and smiles, nudging me to pick my character. I smile back at her. Maybe she isn't as bad as I think, maybe I'm worrying myself too much. 

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We have not long finished playing our show. Me and Josh have showered already and are just hanging round backstage, watching the others perform. I never get bored of watching them live. Ruby is back in the dressing room, on her laptop, probably going through her photos and Josh is busy pranking the Panic! dressing room. No idea what he's actually doing but I am definitely intrigued. Guess we will find out later. I'm cheering for Panic! when I feel a tap on my shoulder. I turn round, greeted by Patrick, he gives off a slight wave. 

"Hey man, you all good?" Patrick asks, shoving his hands in his pockets. 

"I'm trying to be. All I want to do is ask Ruby what happened, what she told you and ask her why she can't talk to me. But I know it's not my place. I'm just worried" He nods his head, taking in what I just said. 

"Look, yeah what she told me wasn't the nicest thing to hear, but she will talk to you when she's ready. You just gotta be there for when she is ready to talk to you. I know that's easier said than done but she has me too, and if she wishes to talk about the situation I already know it so she doesn't have to explain it again to anyone else" Patrick puts his hand on my upper arm, smiling softly, trying to reassure me. I smile back at him and he puts his hand back in his pocket, ne nods his head. 

"Thanks man, I need to try and focus on what's important. She's still here, we haven't completely lost her. I don't know what I would do if she wasn't here" 

"Don't think like that, she is here, and she's talking. Like you said, you have to focus on what's important, the here and now" He pats my upper arm before walking back the way he came. He's right. Focus on the here and now. Push on through, as I used to tell Ruby. 

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-Ruby's P.O.V- 

I managed to go through my photos and pick some out to post in record time today. I knew when I was taking the photos which ones would be the best ones. Which is great. Maybe I'm getting good at this whole photography thing. I've been trying my best to get some blog  posts up as well whist on tour. Been a very busy little bee. Mainly because I have a lot on my plate but also because I am trying to push my thoughts out. My brain has been so loud recently. Not sure if it's due to me opening up to Patrick, the first person other than Matt who knows what happened somewhat. I can hear the boys on stage faintly, by boys I mean the Fall Out Boys, the dressing room door isn't exactly sound proof. Plus it's so loud in this place. The door to the dressing room opens and in sneaks a smirking Josh. I cough, startling him. He put his hand on his chest. 

"Ruby! I didn't think you would still be here" I close my laptop and put it on the table. Josh relaxes a bit. 

"Well, I am. Care to explain why you look sneaky?" I ask him, just as he blows a raspberry and walks into the bathroom, closing the door. I knock on the door. "Come on Josh, what did you do?" I shout through the door. 

"I may or may not have put cling film on Brendon's toilet seat" I can hear him giggling through the door. 

"Josh! You can't do that!!" I still hear him laughing, which makes me laugh too. The toilet flushes and a minute later he comes out the bathroom, massive smirk on his face still. "Joshua Dun!"

"That's my name" He winks at me, making me roll my eyes at him. He sits down on the sofa, pulling his phone from his pocket. I sit on the sofa opposite to him, taking my phone off the table. We hear a bit of commotion from the dressing room next door, which I am guessing is Brendon using his toilet but getting pranked instead. I give Josh an evil glare, he's just sat cracking up with laughter. I roll my eyes at him again. We see Tyler burst into the room, laughing. He leans up against the door to catch his breath, looks like he ran here. Tyler shakes his head at Josh whilst still laughing, Josh laughing too. I hear a knock at the door. Josh and Tyler run off into the bathroom and lock the door. I get up from the sofa, walking over to the door to see Brendon. 

"Are the boys here?" He asks me, looking very annoyed. I cross my arms and lean against the door frame. 

"Nope, haven't seen them in a while, been here on my own. Why?" I know the answer to that one but decide to lie for the boys. 

"Someone, I'm guessing Josh, put cling film on my toilet seat. I went to pee" Brendon pauses, looking down at his legs. "And it backfired" I try my best to hold back my laughter. 

"Oh no, I don't know who would do that" I try to seem sympathetic, hand on my chest. 

"I need a shower" Brendon says before walking back toward his dressing room, slightly stomping, like a sulking toddler. I shut the door, the boys open the bathroom door and they fall to the floor laughing. I roll my eyes once again. They act like little kids sometimes. I'm the mature one round here. My phone goes off. I go back over to the table where I put it, picking it up. I try my best to hide my facial expression from the boys, but it doesn't work. I'm in shock. 

From Unknown: Run little mouse, before I find you

I stand there, frozen. Trying my best to remain calm, but it's impossible. The boys stop laughing long enough to notice my mood change. I stay staring at my phone. I know who it is. And I wasn't ready for them to reach out to me. 

"Hey what's up?" Josh asks me. I lock my phone, trying to snap out of it. 

"Oh nothing, something happened with Matthew and a guy he was seeing. Wasn't expecting it" I lie to them, they go back to being their goofy selves soon enough. I shove my phone in my pocket. 

"I'm gonna go for a walk for a bit" I say to them both as I go for the door. 

"Okay, you know where the hotel is kiddo, be safe, see you soon" Tyler says to me, smiling just as I walk out the door, closing it behind me. I walk toward the exit of the venue, passing the Fall Out Boy boys walking off stage. Patrick spots me and tries to wave at me, but I walk straight past him, not waving back, not even smiling at him. I carry on walking till I'm out the venue. 

'Stay safe' 

I am not safe anymore.